The righteous woman and the woman of bad character

Yahya bin Ja'dah (may Allah have mercy on him) said that the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him) said: "After Islam, the most beneficial thing a Muslim gains is a beautiful woman who pleases him when he looks at her, obeys him when he commands her, and, when he is away on a journey, guards his wealth and her honour."

Sayyiduna Umar (may Allah be pleased with him) said: After faith in Allah Almighty, a man has not been given any good greater than a woman of good character, very loving and child-bearing. And after disbelief, a man has not met any affliction greater than a wife of bad character and sharp tongue. Some women are a blessing one cannot do without, and some women are an affliction one cannot escape.

Sayyiduna Abd al-Rahman bin Abza (may Allah be pleased with him) said: The example of a righteous wife is that of a crown adorned with gold upon the head of a king, and the example of a bad wife of a righteous man is that of a heavy load upon the back of an old man.

Sayyiduna Abu Musa (may Allah be pleased with him) said: There are three people who supplicate but are not answered. The first is a man who has handed his wealth over to a foolish person, while Allah Almighty says: "And do not give the foolish your wealth" [Al-Nisa: 5]. The second is a man who has a woman of bad character in his marriage and does not divorce her nor separate from her. The third is a man who has a right owed to him by another man, but he has no witness to it.

Sayyiduna Abdullah bin Amr (may Allah be pleased with him) said: Shall I not tell you about three calamities? First, an unjust ruler who, if you do a good deed, does not thank you, and if you make a mistake, does not forgive you. Second, a bad neighbour who, if he sees good in you, conceals it, and if he sees evil, spreads it. Third, a bad wife who, if you are present, angers you, and if you are absent, betrays you.

Mughirah (may Allah have mercy on him) said: It was the practice of Ja'dah bin Hubayrah (may Allah have mercy on him) that whenever he gave one of his daughters in marriage, he would advise her in private, ordering her to avoid bad habits and ordering her to have good manners.

Sayyiduna Umar bin al-Khattab (may Allah be pleased with him) said: Women are of three kinds. First, the wife who is good-tempered, gentle-natured, chaste, Muslim, loving and child-bearing, who supports her husband in every situation and does not complain at hardships; but such a woman is rarely found. Second, the chaste Muslim woman who raises children and has no concern other than the children. Third, the woman who is ill-tempered and of bad nature; Allah Almighty places such a woman around the neck of whomever He wills, and no one but Allah can remove her. Men too are of three kinds. First, the chaste, Muslim, intelligent man who understands all kinds of affairs; if he is caught in a difficulty, he gets out of it by his wisdom. Second, the chaste Muslim man who is not himself a man of sound opinion, but when a matter arises, he consults a sensible man of sound opinion and acts on his advice. Third, the ignorant and foolish person who neither has sound opinion himself, nor consults a sensible person, nor obeys a well-wisher.