Those who permitted weeping over the deceased

It is narrated from Sayyiduna Usamah bin Zayd (may Allah be pleased with him) that when the daughter of Sayyidah Zaynab (may Allah be pleased with her) was brought to the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him), tears came to his eyes. The child's breath was rattling, as though it were in an old dry waterskin. Seeing this condition, he (peace and blessings be upon him) wept. A man said: "O Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him)! You are weeping when you have forbidden weeping?" He (peace and blessings be upon him) said: "This is only mercy (these are tears of mercy) which Allah Almighty has placed in the hearts of His servants, and Allah, the Exalted, has mercy only on those of His servants who are merciful."

It is narrated from Sayyiduna Jabir (may Allah be pleased with him) that the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) took Sayyiduna Abd al-Rahman bin Awf (may Allah be pleased with him) by the hand and went out to the date palms. His son Ibrahim was brought to him (peace and blessings be upon him); he was at that time on the point of death. He was placed in the lap of the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him), and he (peace and blessings be upon him) said: "O my son, I have no power to avail you anything against Allah Almighty." And tears came to his eyes (peace and blessings be upon him). Sayyiduna Abd al-Rahman said: "O Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him), you are weeping? Did you (peace and blessings be upon him) not forbid weeping?" He (peace and blessings be upon him) said: "I forbade wailing, two wicked and foolish voices: the voice of amusement and play at the time of a melody, and the flutes of Satan; and the voice at the time of a calamity: scratching faces, tearing collars, and shrieking loudly like Satan. Indeed, these are tears of mercy, and whoever does not show mercy is not shown mercy. O Ibrahim, were it not that this is a true matter, a truthful promise and a path that everyone must tread, and that the last of us will soon join the first of us, our grief for you would have been greater than this. And indeed we are grieved because of you. The eyes weep, the heart is grieved and sorrowful, and we will not say anything that angers our Lord."

It is narrated from Urwah that the hadith of Sayyiduna Abdullah bin Umar (may Allah be pleased with them both) was mentioned before Sayyidah Aishah (may Allah be pleased with her), that the deceased is punished because of the weeping of the living. She said: "Sayyiduna Abu Abd al-Rahman has erred in the same way as he erred concerning those slain at the well of Badr. The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him) only said: 'He is being punished while his family are weeping over him.'"

It is narrated from Sayyiduna Anas (may Allah be pleased with him) that the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said: "Tonight a son was born to me, and I have named him after my father: Ibrahim." Then he sent him to Umm Sayf to be suckled; she was the wife of Abu Sayf, a blacksmith of Madinah. Then the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) set off and I went with him (peace and blessings be upon him). We came upon Abu Sayf blowing into his bellows, and because of it the whole house was filled with smoke. I walked quickly ahead of the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) until I reached Abu Sayf and said to him: "O Abu Sayf, stop, stop! The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him) has come." So he stopped. Then the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) called for his son, held him to his chest, and said what Allah willed. Sayyiduna Anas (may Allah be pleased with him) said: I saw him (Ibrahim) in the throes of death. Tears flowed from the eyes of the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him), and the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said: "The eyes shed tears and the heart is grieved, and we will not say anything except what pleases our Lord. O Ibrahim, we are deeply grieved and saddened because of you."

Salim said: The verse of the Qur'an "and that they will not disobey you in what is right" refers to refraining from wailing.

It is narrated from Sayyiduna Abdullah bin Umar (may Allah be pleased with them both) that the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him) returned on the day of Uhud and heard the women of Banu Abd al-Ashhal weeping over their dead. He said: "But Hamzah has no women to weep for him." So the women of the Ansar came and wept over Hamzah. He slept, then woke up and said: "Woe to them! Are they still here until now? Tell them to go back, and let them not weep over anyone who dies after today."

Ikrimah said that Sayyiduna Abdullah bin Abbas (may Allah be pleased with them both) said: Remember this hadith. One of the daughters of the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) was near death. He (peace and blessings be upon him) lifted her onto his hands and held her to his chest. The narrator said: She was in the throes of death until she passed away. He (peace and blessings be upon him) put her down while he (peace and blessings be upon him) was weeping. Sayyidah Umm Ayman began to cry out, and the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said: "It is not proper for you to weep in the presence of the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him)." Sayyidah Umm Ayman said: "Do I not see the Messenger of Allah weeping?" He (peace and blessings be upon him) said: "I am not weeping; these are tears of mercy."