The Importance of Marriage
1-Aisha al-Siddiqa al-Tahira (may Allah be pleased with her) narrates that the Messenger of Allah ﷺ said: whoever has the ability to marry should marry.
2-عَنْ عَبْدِاللَّهِ بْنِ مَسْعُودٍ : قَالَ لَنَا رَسُولُ اللَّهِ ﷺ: يَا مَعْشَرَ الشَّبَابِ، مَنِ اسْتَطَاعَ مِنْكُمُ الْبَاءَةَ فَلْيَتَزَوَّجْ، فَإِنَّهُ أَغَضُّ لِلْبَصَرِ، وَأَحْصَنُ لِلْفَرْجِ، وَمَنْ لَمْ يَسْتَطِعْ فَعَلَيْهِ بِالصَّوْمِ؛ فَإِنَّهُ لَهُ وِجَاءٌ. مُتَّفَقٌ عَلَيْهِ.
Translation: “Abdullah bin Mas’ud (may Allah be pleased with him) narrates that the Messenger of Allah ﷺ said: O assembly of youth! Whoever among you has the means to marry should marry, for it lowers the gaze and guards the private parts. And whoever does not have the means should fast, for fasting is a shield for him.”
3-(وَأَنْكِحُوا الْأَيَامَى مِنْكُمْ وَالصَّالِحِينَ مِنْ عِبَادِكُمْ وَإِمَائِكُمْ إِنْ يَكُونُوا فُقَرَاءَ يُغْنِهِمُ اللَّهُ مِنْ فَضْلِهِ وَاللَّهُ وَاسِعٌ عَلِيمٌ * وَلْيَسْتَعْفِفِ الَّذِينَ لَا يَجِدُونَ نِكَاحًا حَتَّى يُغْنِيَهُمُ اللَّهُ مِنْ فَضْلِهِ)
Translation: “And marry off the single men and women among you, and the righteous among your male and female slaves. If they are poor, Allah will enrich them from His bounty, and Allah is All-Encompassing, All-Knowing. And let those who cannot find a means to marry keep themselves chaste, until Allah enriches them from His bounty.”
4-فَانْكِحُوْا مَا طَابَ لَكُمْ مِّنَ النِّسَآءِ مَثْنٰى وَثُلَاثَ وَرُبَاعَ
Translation
Marry those women who please you, two, three or four.
The Virtue of Marriage
1–أَخْبَرَنَا قُتَيْبَةُ، قَالَ: حَدَّثَنَا اللَّيْثُ، عَنْ مُحَمَّدِ بْنِ عَجْلَانَ، عَنْ سَعِيدٍ، عَنْ أَبِي هُرَيْرَةَ، أَنّ رَسُولَ اللَّهِ صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ، قَالَ:” ثَلَاثَةٌ حَقٌّ عَلَى اللَّهِ عَزَّ وَجَلَّ عَوْنُهُمْ: الْمُكَاتَبُ الَّذِي يُرِيدُ الْأَدَاءَ، وَالنَّاكِحُ الَّذِي يُرِيدُ الْعَفَافَ، وَالْمُجَاهِدُ فِي سَبِيلِ اللَّهِ۔
Translation
Abu Hurairah (may Allah be pleased with him) narrates that the Messenger of Allah ﷺ said: “There are three (types of people) whom Allah has made it binding upon Himself to help: (first) the mukatab¹ who seeks to pay the fixed sum and gain his freedom; (second) the one who marries seeking to live a life of chastity and purity; (third) the mujahid who has set out to fight in the way of Allah.”
2-Abu Umamah (may Allah be pleased with him) narrates: In a lengthy hadith, the Messenger of Allah ﷺ said: whoever marries for the sake of Allah has completed his faith.
3-Anas (may Allah be pleased with him) narrates: The Messenger of Allah ﷺ said: whoever Allah has granted a righteous wife, He has helped him with half of his religion, so let him fear Allah regarding the other half.
4-عن أنس بن مالك يقول: سمعت رسول الله صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ (يقول): ” من أراد أن يلقى الله طاهرًا مُطَهَّرًا، فليتزوج الحرائر
Translation
Anas bin Malik (may Allah be pleased with him) said: I heard the Messenger of Allah ﷺ say: “Whoever wishes to meet Allah pure and purified, let him marry free women.”
3-Whoever deliberately refrains from marriage despite having the means is sinful.
As evidenced by:
1-حَدَّثَنَا أَحْمَدُ بْنُ الْأَزْهَرِ قَالَ: حَدَّثَنَا آدَمُ قَالَ: حَدَّثَنَا عِيسَى بْنُ مَيْمُونٍ، عَنِ الْقَاسِمِ، عَنْ عَائِشَةَ، قَالَتْ: قَالَ رَسُولُ اللَّهِ صَلَّى اللهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ: «النِّكَاحُ مِنْ سُنَّتِي، فَمَنْ لَمْ يَعْمَلْ بِسُنَّتِي فَلَيْسَ مِنِّي، وَتَزَوَّجُوا، فَإِنِّي مُكَاثِرٌ بِكُمُ الْأُمَمَ، وَمَنْ كَانَ ذَا طَوْلٍ فَلْيَنْكِحْ، وَمَنْ لَمْ يَجِدْ فَعَلَيْهِ بِالصِّيَامِ، فَإِنَّ الصَّوْمَ لَهُ وِجَاءٌ»
Translation: Umm al-Mu’minin Aisha al-Siddiqa (may Allah be pleased with her) narrates that the Messenger of Allah ﷺ said: “Marriage is my way. Whoever does not follow my way has no connection with me. Marry, for I will boast of your numbers before the other nations. Whoever has the financial means should marry, and whoever does not find a match should keep fasting, for fasting crushes desire.”
2-وحَدَّثَنِي أَبُو بَكْرِ بْنُ نَافِعٍ الْعَبْدِيُّ، حَدَّثَنَا بَهْزٌ، حَدَّثَنَا حَمَّادُ بْنُ سَلَمَةَ، عَنْ ثَابِتٍ، عَنْ أَنَسٍ، أَنَّ نَفَرًا مِنْ أَصْحَابِ النَّبِيِّ صَلَّى اللهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ سَأَلُوا أَزْوَاجَ النَّبِيِّ صَلَّى اللهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ عَنْ عَمَلِهِ فِي السِّرِّ؟ فَقَالَ بَعْضُهُمْ: لَا أَتَزَوَّجُ النِّسَاءَ، وَقَالَ بَعْضُهُمْ: لَا آكُلُ اللَّحْمَ، وَقَالَ بَعْضُهُمْ: لَا أَنَامُ عَلَى فِرَاشٍ، فَحَمِدَ اللهَ وَأَثْنَى عَلَيْهِ. فَقَالَ: «مَا بَالُ أَقْوَامٍ قَالُوا كَذَا وَكَذَا؟ لَكِنِّي أُصَلِّي وَأَنَامُ، وَأَصُومُ وَأُفْطِرُ، وَأَتَزَوَّجُ النِّسَاءَ، فَمَنْ رَغِبَ عَنْ سُنَّتِي فَلَيْسَ مِنِّي»
Translation
Anas (may Allah be pleased with him) narrates that some of the Companions of the Prophet ﷺ asked the wives of the Prophet ﷺ about his practices in private. Then one of them said: “I will not marry women.” Another said: “I will not eat meat.” And another said: “I will not sleep on a bed.” He praised Allah, extolled Him, and said: “What is wrong with people who say such and such? But I pray and I sleep, I fast and I break my fast, and I marry women. Whoever turns away from my Sunnah is not from me.”
3-حَدَّثَنَا بِشْرُ بْنُ آدَمَ، وَزَيْدُ بْنُ أَخْزَمَ، قَالَا: حَدَّثَنَا مُعَاذُ بْنُ هِشَامٍ قَالَ: حَدَّثَنَا أَبِي، عَنْ قَتَادَةَ، عَنِ الْحَسَنِ، عَنْ سَمُرَةَ، أَنَّ رَسُولَ اللَّهِ صَلَّى اللهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ، «نَهَى عَنِ التَّبَتُّلِ». زَادَ زَيْدُ بْنُ أَخْزَمَ: وَقَرَأَ قَتَادَةُ: {وَلَقَدْ أَرْسَلْنَا رُسُلًا مِنْ قَبْلِكَ وَجَعَلْنَا لَهُمْ أَزْوَاجًا وَذُرِّيَّةً}
Translation
Samurah (may Allah be pleased with him) narrates that the Messenger of Allah ﷺ forbade remaining unmarried (tabattul). Zayd bin Akhzam added that Qatadah (to clarify this matter) recited this verse: ﴿وَلَقَدْ أَرْسَلْنَا رُسُلًا مِّن قَبْلِكَ وَجَعَلْنَا لَهُمْ أَزْوَٰجًا وَذُرِّيَّةً ۚ﴾ “And We certainly sent messengers before you and gave them wives and offspring.”
4-What is the ruling on Hashimi women marrying non-Hashimi men?
Among the baseless matters is this: some people who claim to be from the Banu Hashim say that no man can be their equal and peer, so they neither give their daughters in marriage to people of other families nor take wives from them. This is a very great error, great ignorance, an injustice to women, and a matter that Allah and His Messenger ﷺ did not command. Rather, in the time of the Messenger of Allah ﷺ and the Companions (may Allah be pleased with them all), Hashimi women were married to non-Hashimi men. A few examples are as follows.
(1): The marriage of a sayyida (female descendant of the Prophet ﷺ) to a non-sayyid is undoubtedly permissible, and there is absolutely no objection to it. Just as Sayyida Zaynab (may Allah be pleased with her), daughter of the Messenger of Allah ﷺ, was in marriage to Abu al-As (may Allah be pleased with him), and Abu al-As bin Rabi’ (may Allah be pleased with him) was not a sayyid according to the commonly used terminology, and probably was not a Hashimi either, as is stated explicitly in Sahih al-Bukhari.
2 – Likewise, two daughters of the Prophet ﷺ, Sayyidah Ruqayyah and Sayyidah Umm Kulthum (may Allah be pleased with them), were successively married to Hadrat Uthman ibn Affan al-Umawi (may Allah be pleased with him). It is evident that Hadrat Uthman (may Allah be pleased with him) was not a sayyid according to today’s terminology, and was not even a Hashimi. These events are so well known that there is no need to cite references for them. They are recorded and clearly stated in all authentic books that contain hadith and the history of Islam.
3 – Sayyidah Umm Kulthum bint Ali, who was born to Sayyidah Fatimah al-Zahra (may Allah be pleased with her), was married to Hadrat Umar al-Faruq (may Allah be pleased with him), and Zayd ibn Umar was born from the seed of Hadrat Umar al-Faruq (may Allah be pleased with him), who lived on until after the martyrdom of Hadrat Umar al-Faruq (may Allah be pleased with him).
Please see Tusi’s Tawdih al-Ahkam and Al-Istibsar, and Majalis al-Mu’minin. Furthermore, there is no verse or hadith in the Qur’an and Hadith that forbids a sayyida woman from marrying a non-sayyid man. Greatness is not based on lineage, ancestry or family distinction, but on taqwa.
The Prophet ﷺ married Zaynab bint Jahsh (may Allah be pleased with her), the daughter of his paternal aunt Umaymah bint Abd al-Muttalib, to Zayd (may Allah be pleased with him), as mentioned in Surah al-Ahzab, even though Zayd ibn Harithah (may Allah be pleased with him) was a slave, and Sayyidah Zaynab bint Jahsh (may Allah be pleased with her) belonged to the Quraysh family. Likewise, Ali ibn Husayn (may Allah be pleased with him), known as Zayn al-Abidin, was married to Shahrbanu bint Yazdgird ibn Shahriyar, who was not a sayyida. See Sirat Husayn aur un ke Karnamay.
Note
It is not proven at all from the Qur’an and Hadith, or from the Companions (may Allah be pleased with them all), that a Hashimi woman cannot marry a non-Hashimi man, nor is it written that a Hashimi man cannot marry a non-Hashimi woman. Rather, it has been transmitted in both Shia and Sunni books, and from all the Companions (may Allah be pleased with them all) and the Ahl al-Bayt (may Allah be pleased with them all), that a Hashimi man may marry a non-Hashimi woman, and a Hashimi woman may marry a non-Hashimi man.
Warning As is clear like the light of day from the Qur’an and Hadith and from the Companions and Ahl al-Bayt (may Allah be pleased with them all).
Types of Nikah
1 – Nikah Masnunah
A marriage undertaken under the guardianship of the wali with the intention of sharing life-long companionship is called Nikah Masnunah, and it is permissible.
Hadrat Aisha Siddiqah Tahirah (may Allah be pleased with her) narrates that, in the same manner as people marry today, a man would send a proposal to another man (the wali) on behalf of his daughter or a female relative, and the wali would fix the mahr and conduct the nikah with his daughter or female relative.
2 – Nikah Shighar (Watta Satta)
A man gives his daughter or sister in marriage on the condition that the other man also gives his daughter in marriage to him, whether or not a mahr is mentioned. This nikah is haram.
Sayyiduna Abu Hurairah (may Allah be pleased with him) narrates that the Messenger of Allah ﷺ forbade shighar. Ibn Numayr (the narrator) added this addition in his narration: Shighar is that one man says to another: “Give your daughter in marriage to me and I will give my daughter in marriage to you,” or “Give your sister in marriage to me and I will give my sister in marriage to you.”
Abdullah ibn Umar (may Allah be pleased with them both) narrates that the Messenger of Allah ﷺ forbade nikah shighar, and shighar is that a man marries his daughter to another person on the condition that the other person marries his daughter to him, and neither of the two daughters has a mahr fixed.
Note
(1) Nikah shighar, or exchange marriages, refers to the form known in the Punjab as “Watta Satta.”
Its explanation has already been mentioned in the narration.
(2) The harm in nikah shighar is that if there is discord between husband and wife on one side, an attempt is made to repay it on the other side, to the extent that if one of the two husbands divorces his wife for some reason, the other also divorces his innocent wife.
(3) In the period of ignorance (jahiliyyah), in nikah shighar no mahr was fixed, and not even mahr al-mithl was paid. Effectively, a woman was exchanged for a woman.
Nowadays, although a mahr is fixed, the same harm still persists: the wrong done by one man is sought to be avenged by wronging his daughter. Therefore, one should abstain from this form as well.
Warning Hadrat Ibn Umar (may Allah be pleased with them both) narrated that the Prophet ﷺ said: “There is no shighar in Islam.”
