Abu Salih narrates from Abu Hurayrah (may Allah be pleased with him) that the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him) said: "The best charity is that which leaves (the giver) self-sufficient, and the upper hand is better than the lower hand; and begin with those you look after." Abu Hurayrah (may Allah be pleased with him) said: "Your wife will say: 'Feed me, or else divorce me.' Your servant will say to you: 'Feed me, or sell me.' And your son will say: 'To whom will you entrust me?'" They said: O Abu Hurayrah, is this something you say from your own opinion, or is it the saying of the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him)? Abu Hurayrah (may Allah be pleased with him) said: No, rather this is from my own (reasoning). Al-Bukhari (may Allah have mercy on him) recorded it in the Sahih from Umar bin Hafs bin Ghiyath, from his father, from al-A'mash.
Hadith Referenceالسنن الكبرى للبيهقي / كتاب النفقات / 15711