A Person Who Disobeys His Father
Question
A person who is sensible and married disobeys his father. He neither provides maintenance for his wife, nor does he care for his children; rather, he causes them distress. The father, out of compassion, has been bearing the expenses of his wife and children himself. This person is punctual in prayer and fasting, yet he disobeys his father. According to the Shariah, is such a person deserving of salvation?
Answer
الحمد لله، والصلاة والسلام علىٰ رسول الله، أما بعد!
The Shar’i Ruling on Obeying Parents
Obedience to and compliance with one’s parents is obligatory and necessary for as long as they do not order disobedience to Allah. Disobeying them is a major sin.
Hadith of the Prophet ﷺ:
“ألا انبئكم بأكبر الكبائر؟ قلنا : بلى يا رسول الله، قال : الإشراك بالله وعقوق الوالدين”
Meaning: “Shall I not tell you of the greatest of the major sins? We said: Certainly, O Messenger of Allah. He ﷺ said: Associating partners with Allah, and disobedience to parents.”
Definition of Disobedience
The meaning of ‘uquq al-walidayn is:
“ايذاؤهما بأى نوع كان من أنواع الأذى، قل أو كثر، نهيا عنه، أو مخالفتمها فيما يأمران أو ينهيان، بشرط انتفاء المعصية فى الكل”
That is, causing parents any kind of distress, whether minor or major, or disobeying their commands (provided they are not sinful).
The Rights of Wife and Children
The provision of maintenance and care for the wife and children is the husband’s responsibility:
The Noble Qur’an:
وعلى المولود له رزقهن وكسوتهن بالمعروف
وعاشروهن بالمعروف
فإمساك بمعروف أو تسريح بإحسان
Hadith of the Prophet ﷺ (narrated from Abu Hurairah, may Allah be pleased with him):
“وَابْدَأْ بِمَنْ تَعُولُ، تقول المرأة: إما أن تطعمني، وإما أن تطلقني، ويقول العبد: أطعمني واستعملني، ويقول الابن: أطعمني إلى أن تدعني”
Summary of the Fatwa and Clarification of the Issue
The condition of this person:
◈ He disobeys his parents
◈ He does not provide maintenance to his wife and children
◈ He causes them distress
◈ His father is bearing their expenses
Such a person is one who wastes the rights of people, a wrongdoer, and one who commits a major sin.
Types and Conditions of Salvation
➊ A perfect monotheist and righteous person:
– One who never committed a sin
– Remained constantly upon righteous deeds
– Will attain the first salvation, meaning:
◈ After death, he will be safe from the punishment of the grave, the barzakh, and the Day of Resurrection
◈ He will enter Paradise without reckoning
➋ A sinful Muslim who repents:
– If he committed sins
– But made sincere repentance and died upon repentance
– Then he too will be safe from all punishments and enter Paradise
– (بفضل اللہ ورحمته)
➌ A sinful Muslim who dies without repentance:
– If he dies without repentance
– Then he will be subject to the will of Allah the Exalted:
◈ If Allah wills, He will admit him into Paradise without punishment (بفضلہ ورحمته)
◈ Or if He wills, He will punish him and then admit him into Paradise:
▪ only in the barzakh
▪ or in both the barzakh and the Day of Resurrection
◈ In any case, ultimate salvation is certain
Conclusion
This person is one who commits a major sin.
– If he reforms himself and dies after sincere repentance, he will attain the first salvation
– If he dies without repentance, his outcome depends on the will of Allah the Exalted:
“إن شاء عذبه، وإن شاء غفر له”
ھذا ما عندي والله أعلم بالصواب
