❖ Permissibility of Looking at One’s Fiancée Before Marriage
Written by: ʿImrān Ayyūb Lāhorī
❖ ➊ Glancing at a Prospective Bride to Foster Affection
Narrated by Mughīrah ibn Shuʿbah رضي الله عنه:
“I proposed to a woman, so the Prophet ﷺ asked: ‘Did you look at her?’ I replied: ‘No.’ He said:”
“فَانْظُرْ إِلَيْهَا فَإِنَّهُ أَحْرَىٰ أَنْ يُؤْدَمَ بَيْنَكُمَا“
“Then look at her, for it is more likely that affection will develop between you.”
📚 Ṣaḥīḥ Ibn Mājah: 1511
📚 Ibn Mājah: 1865
📚 Aḥmad: 4/244
📚 Al-Dārimī: 2/134
📚 Al-Tirmidhī: 1087
📚 Al-Nasāʾī: 3/14
📚 ʿAbd al-Razzāq: 1335
📚 Al-Dāraqutnī: 3/252
📚 Ibn al-Jārūd: 675
📚 Sharḥ Maʿānī al-Āthār: 3/14
📚 Sharḥ al-Sunnah: 5/14
❖ ➋ Recommendation to View What Encourages Marriage
Narrated by Jābir ibn ʿAbdillāh رضي الله عنه:
“When one of you proposes to a woman, if he is able to look at what would encourage him to marry her, let him do so.”
📚 Ḥasan: Ṣaḥīḥ Abū Dāwūd: 1832
📚 Aḥmad: 3/334
📚 Al-Ḥākim: 2/165
📚 Al-Bayhaqī: 7/84
❖ ➌ No Harm in Looking When Intending Marriage
Another narration states:
“إِذَا أَلْقَى اللَّهُ فِي قَلْبِ امْرِئٍ خِطْبَةَ امْرَأَةٍ، فَلَا بَأْسَ أَنْ يَنْظُرَ إِلَيْهَا“
“When Allah places in a man’s heart the desire to propose to a woman, there is no harm if he looks at her.”
📚 Ṣaḥīḥ Ibn Mājah: 1510
📚 Ibn Mājah: 1864
📚 Aḥmad: 4/225
📚 Ibn Abī Shaybah: 4/256
📚 Ṭabarānī al-Kabīr: 19/224
📚 Sharḥ Maʿānī al-Āthār: 3/13
❖ The Prophet ﷺ Looked at a Woman Who Proposed Herself
A woman came to the Prophet ﷺ offering herself in marriage. The narration mentions:
“فَنَظَرَ رَسُولُ اللَّهِ ﷺ فَصَعَّدَ النَّظَرَ إِلَيْهَا وَصَوَّبَهُ، ثُمَّ طَأْطَأَ رَأْسَهُ“
“The Prophet ﷺ looked at her, scanning her up and down, then lowered his head.”
📚 Ṣaḥīḥ al-Bukhārī: 5135
📚 Ṣaḥīḥ Muslim: 1425
📚 Abū Dāwūd: 2111
📚 Al-Tirmidhī: 1114
📚 Al-Nasāʾī: 6/123
📚 Ibn Mājah: 1889
📚 Al-Muwaṭṭaʾ Mālik: 2/526
📚 Al-Dārimī: 2/142
📚 Al-Dāraqutnī: 3/247
📚 Sharḥ Maʿānī al-Āthār: 3/16
❖ Conclusion:
✔ The Prophetic Sunnah permits a man to glance at a woman he intends to marry.
✔ This serves the purpose of fostering mutual understanding and affection.
✔ The viewing must be with pure intentions and within the bounds of Sharīʿah.
✔ Repeated or lustful gazes or privacy (khalwah) are not allowed.
وَاللهُ أَعْلَمُ بِالصَّوَابِ
And Allāh knows best what is correct.
