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الادب المفرد
Adab al-Mufrad
كتاب الكرم و يتيم
Book of Generosity and the Orphan
بَابُ كُنَّ لِلْيَتِيمِ كَالأَبِ الرَّحِيمِ
Chapter: Be to the Orphan Like a Compassionate Father
Al-Adab al-Mufrad 140 — Be to the Orphan Like a Compassionate Father
حَدَّثَنَا مُوسَى، قَالَ: حَدَّثَنَا سَلاَّمُ بْنُ أَبِي مُطِيعٍ، عَنْ أَسْمَاءَ بْنِ عُبَيْدٍ قَالَ: قُلْتُ لِابْنِ سِيرِينَ: عِنْدِي يَتِيمٌ، قَالَ: اصْنَعْ بِهِ مَا تَصْنَعُ بِوَلَدِكَ، اضْرِبْهُ مَا تَضْرِبُ وَلَدَكَ.
It is narrated from Asma bin Ubaid that I asked Ibn Sirin (may Allah have mercy on him), "I have an orphan under my care (how should I treat him)?" He replied: "Treat him as you treat your own children, and for whatever reason you discipline your own children, discipline him as well."
Explanation & Benefits
Shaykh Maulana Usman Muneeb
Benefits and Issues:
Just as, in order to save a patient, a doctor sometimes has to perform an operation, similarly, a father also, at times, has to reprimand his children for their upbringing. Doing so is not contrary to compassion. Excessive leniency spoils children. In the same way, if it becomes necessary to be strict with an orphan under one’s care, it is permissible, rather even desirable.
The Messenger of Allah (sallallahu alayhi wa sallam) said:
((‘Hang the whip where the people of the house can see it, for indeed it is a means of discipline for them.’’))
(Al-Mu‘jam al-Kabir by al-Tabarani: 3/92/2. Silsilah Sahihah, no. 1447)
Whether the children are one’s own or under one’s guardianship, for their proper upbringing it is necessary that, along with gentleness and compassion, strictness should also be employed when needed.
Just as, in order to save a patient, a doctor sometimes has to perform an operation, similarly, a father also, at times, has to reprimand his children for their upbringing. Doing so is not contrary to compassion. Excessive leniency spoils children. In the same way, if it becomes necessary to be strict with an orphan under one’s care, it is permissible, rather even desirable.
The Messenger of Allah (sallallahu alayhi wa sallam) said:
((‘Hang the whip where the people of the house can see it, for indeed it is a means of discipline for them.’’))
(Al-Mu‘jam al-Kabir by al-Tabarani: 3/92/2. Silsilah Sahihah, no. 1447)
Whether the children are one’s own or under one’s guardianship, for their proper upbringing it is necessary that, along with gentleness and compassion, strictness should also be employed when needed.
Source: Fadlullah al-Ahad: Urdu Commentary on al-Adab al-Mufrad, Page: 140
