❖ Question:
For two years, my husband would put my breast in his mouth. When he realized his mistake, he went to Mawlānā Sayyid Aḥmad Shāh (رحمه الله) of Gujrat to ask about the issue. The Mawlānā gave a written answer:
“In the mentioned case, if a man puts his wife’s breast in his mouth, it is a disliked (makrūh) act, but it does not affect the marriage.”
However, my heart was not satisfied with this decision, and I continued going to my husband. After ten years, I again began telling my husband that our nikāḥ is not valid, but my husband repeatedly told me that our marriage is completely valid. Finally, upon my persistent insistence, one day he became angry and, to make me understand, said:
“I did not put your breast in my mouth to drink milk — I put it in my mouth at your request.”
He spoke these words two months ago.
Now kindly inform me:
- What is my husband’s fault in this matter, and what is my fault?
- Is our marriage valid or has it ended?
❖ Answer:
الحمد لله، والصلاة والسلام علىٰ رسول الله، أما بعد!
In the case asked about, the answer given by the late Muftī Sayyid Aḥmad Shāh رحمه الله is absolutely correct and sound:
✦ The mentioned act has no effect on the marriage (nikāḥ).
❖ Evidence That the Marriage Is Not Affected:
✿ Imām al-Nawawī رحمه الله, in his commentary on Ṣaḥīḥ Muslim (Kitāb al-Raḍāʿah), has clarified that if a husband, during intimacy with his wife, puts her breast in his mouth and sucks it, and even if a drop of milk goes into his mouth, the marriage does not break.
✿ Thus, the act is certainly disliked (makrūh), but it has no effect on the marriage, and the marriage remains completely valid and intact.
❖ Rulings on Fosterage (Raḍāʿah):
✿ It should also be kept in mind that fosterage (a relationship established through milk) is established only when:
➊ The child drinking the milk is less than two years old,
➋ And his basic nourishment is only milk.
According to the majority of the Ummah’s scholars, this is an agreed-upon and consensus issue.
As stated in Muwaṭṭa Imām Muḥammad:
(أخبرنا مالك أخبرنا نافع أن عبد الله بن عمر كان يقول لا رضاعة إلا لمن أرضع فى الصغر)
(Bāb al-Raḍāʿ, pp. 270, 274)
“ʿAbdullāh ibn ʿUmar رضي الله عنهما said: Fosterage (raḍāʿah) is established only when the child is breastfed in infancy.”
❖ Conclusion:
✿ This narration makes it clear that if a woman breastfeeds an adult man, he does not become her milk-son.
✿ Therefore, your idea that in this way your husband has become your son is completely wrong.
✿ This whisper (waswasah) is entirely from Shayṭān, and it is essential to guard against it.
✿ Your marriage is valid and intact in every case, so do not fall for Shayṭān’s deception and ruin the peace of your home.
However, for the future, try to keep your husband cautious in this matter.
ھذا ما عندي واللہ أعلم بالصواب
This is what I have, and Allah knows best what is correct.
