The Consequences of Cutting Family Ties

Written by: Fadilat Al-Sheikh Abdul Salam bin Muhammad (Hafizahullah)

Jabir bin Mut’im (may Allah be pleased with him) narrated that the Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) said:​

"The one who cuts family ties will not enter Paradise."
[Sahih Bukhari and Sahih Muslim]

References:​

• [Bukhari 5984, Muslim: Al-Birr wal-Sila 18], and also mentioned in Tuhfat al-Ashraf [2/411].

Key Points:​

1. Quranic Warnings About Cutting Family Ties:
   The Quran includes severe warnings for those who sever family ties and cause corruption on earth:
   
   "And they sever what Allah has ordered to be joined."
   [Surah Ar-Ra’d: 25]
   
   Allah also says:
   
   "So would you perhaps, if you turned away, cause corruption on earth and sever your family ties? Those are the ones whom Allah has cursed, so He deafened them and blinded their vision."
   [Surah Muhammad: 22-23]
2. What is Meant by "Family Ties" (Silah Rahmi)?
   Family ties exist on several levels:
   
   • The first is relationships that prohibit marriage, such as between an uncle and his niece, or between an aunt and her nephew. For example, it is forbidden for a man to marry a woman and her paternal or maternal aunt at the same time, as doing so would sever family ties.
   • The second level is relationships through which inheritance is passed. Clearly, the ties of kinship that enable inheritance are stronger than those that do not.
   • The third level includes all other relationships where family bonds are recognized. The closest of these relationships are with one's mother, followed by the father, and then other relatives in descending order. While all relatives deserve some degree of connection, the obligation to maintain family ties grows stronger with closer relatives.
3. The Minimum Level of Family Ties:
   The minimum form of maintaining family ties is to keep communication open and exchange greetings. If even this minimal form of connection is lost, then family ties are considered severed. More substantial forms of maintaining ties include checking on relatives’ well-being, helping them financially or physically, and forgiving their mistakes.
4. The Ideal of Family Ties in Islam:
   The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) explained the true meaning of maintaining family ties:
   
   "The person who perfectly maintains the ties of kinship is not the one who reciprocates the good deeds of relatives, but the one who continues to uphold family ties even when they are severed by others."
   [Sahih Bukhari 5991]
5. Three Levels of Interaction with Relatives:
   
   • Maintaining ties (Silah Rahmi): When relatives sever ties, the person continues to maintain a relationship with them and shows kindness.
   • Reciprocation (Mukafat): When relatives treat a person kindly, the person responds with equal kindness.
   • Severing ties (Qat' Rahmi): When a person severs ties with relatives, either due to their bad behavior or even in spite of their good treatment. Severing ties after receiving good treatment is the worst form of cutting family ties. Even worse is the person who initiates the severing of ties.
6. A Story About Patience with Relatives:
   Abu Hurairah (may Allah be pleased with him) narrated that a man said:
   
   "I have relatives with whom I try to keep good relations, but they sever their ties with me. I treat them kindly, but they treat me badly. I am patient with them, but they behave ignorantly towards me."
   The Prophet (peace be upon him) replied:
   "If what you say is true, it is as if you are throwing hot ashes at them. And you will have a helper from Allah against them as long as you remain patient."
   [Sahih Muslim 6525]
7. "The One Who Cuts Family Ties Will Not Enter Paradise":
   This means that a person who knowingly and deliberately severs family ties, despite knowing that it is prohibited, will not enter Paradise. If a person considers severing ties as permissible (halal), despite it being prohibited (haram), they are no longer considered a Muslim.
   
   However, if someone acknowledges that cutting family ties is haram but does so due to their own shortcomings, they will not be among the fortunate who enter Paradise initially. This interpretation is given because Muslims who commit major sins do not remain in Hell forever.

In conclusion, maintaining family ties is essential in Islam, and cutting them leads to severe consequences in both this world and the Hereafter. Maintaining relationships, even with difficult relatives, is a key to success and blessings in both this life and the next.