❖ Disobedience to Parents and Neglect of Wife and Children: An Islamic Legal Ruling ❖
Source: Fatāwā Shaykh al-Ḥadīth Mubārakpūrī, Volume 1, Page 150
A man of sound mind, who is married, disobeys his father, provides no financial support to his wife, neglects his children, and causes them distress. His father, out of affection, bears the financial burden of his son's family. This man, though regular in prayer and fasting, is persistently disobedient to his parents.
According to Shariah, can such a person be deserving of salvation?
Obedience to one’s parents is obligatory (farḍ) as long as they do not command disobedience to Allah.
Disobeying them is counted among the major sins (kabā’ir).
Prophetic Hadith:
"ألا أنبئكم بأكبر الكبائر؟ قلنا : بلى يا رسول الله، قال : الإشراك بالله وعقوق الوالدين"
(Ṣaḥīḥ al-Bukhārī: Book of Manners, Chapter on Disobedience to Parents, 2/77)
🖊 Meaning:
"Shall I not inform you of the gravest of sins?"
We replied, "Indeed, O Messenger of Allah!"
He said, "Associating partners with Allah and disobedience to one’s parents."
As defined by scholars:
"ايذاؤهما بأى نوع كان من أنواع الأذى، قل أو كثر، نهيا عنه، أو مخالفتمها فيما يأمران أو ينهيان، بشرط انتفاء المعصية فى الكل"
“Causing harm to one's parents in any way, whether minor or major, and disobeying them in what they command or forbid (so long as it is not sinful), is considered disobedience.”
Islam commands that a husband must support his wife and children financially and emotionally.
Qur'anic Evidence:
﴿وعلى المولود له رزقهن وكسوتهن بالمعروف﴾ (Al-Baqarah: 233)
“It is the duty of the father to provide for them and clothe them in a reasonable manner.”
﴿وعاشروهن بالمعروف﴾ (An-Nisāʾ: 19)
“And live with them in kindness.”
﴿فإمساك بمعروف أو تسريح بإحسان﴾ (Al-Baqarah: 229)
“Either retain [them] with kindness or release [them] with good treatment.”
Hadith:
Narrated from Abū Hurayrah (رضي الله عنه):
"وَابْدَأْ بِمَنْ تَعُولُ..."
“Begin with those under your care…”
(Ṣaḥīḥ al-Bukhārī: Book of Nafaqāt, Chapter on Obligatory Spending, 6/189, 219; Book of Tafsīr, Sūrah Al-Mumtaḥanah, 6/62)
Disobedient to his parents
Does not provide for wife and children
Causes them harm
Financial responsibilities borne by his father
Such a person is:
◈ A violator of rights of others (ḥuqūq al-ʿibād)
◈ A ẓālim (oppressor)
◈ Guilty of major sins (kabā’ir)
– Never committed major sins
– Constantly engaged in righteous deeds
– Will attain immediate salvation after death:
◈ Protected from the torment of the grave, Barzakh, and the Day of Judgment
◈ Will enter Paradise without reckoning
– Committed sins
– Made sincere repentance (tawbah)
– Died upon repentance
– Will be granted salvation without punishment, by Allah’s mercy
– Died without repenting
– His fate lies with Allah’s will (mashīʾah):
◈ If Allah wills, He may forgive him without punishment
◈ Or, He may punish him first —
▪ In the grave
▪ Or in both the grave and on the Day of Judgment
Regardless, eventual salvation is guaranteed due to his faith (īmān).
◈ This man is guilty of major sins.
◈ If he reforms himself and dies with sincere repentance, he will be granted immediate salvation (najāt ʾūlā).
◈ If he dies without repenting, his outcome will be subject to Allah’s decision:
"إن شاء عذبه، وإن شاء غفر له"
“If He wills, He will punish him, and if He wills, He will forgive him.”
*(Mufassal Reference: Muḥaddith Delhi, Vol. 8, Issue 1, Rabīʿ al-Awwal 1359 AH / May 1940)
ھذا ما عندي، والله أعلم بالصواب
Source: Fatāwā Shaykh al-Ḥadīth Mubārakpūrī, Volume 1, Page 150❖ Question:
A man of sound mind, who is married, disobeys his father, provides no financial support to his wife, neglects his children, and causes them distress. His father, out of affection, bears the financial burden of his son's family. This man, though regular in prayer and fasting, is persistently disobedient to his parents.
According to Shariah, can such a person be deserving of salvation?
❖ Islamic Command Regarding Obedience to Parents:
Obedience to one’s parents is obligatory (farḍ) as long as they do not command disobedience to Allah.
Disobeying them is counted among the major sins (kabā’ir).
Prophetic Hadith:"ألا أنبئكم بأكبر الكبائر؟ قلنا : بلى يا رسول الله، قال : الإشراك بالله وعقوق الوالدين"
(Ṣaḥīḥ al-Bukhārī: Book of Manners, Chapter on Disobedience to Parents, 2/77)
🖊 Meaning:
"Shall I not inform you of the gravest of sins?"
We replied, "Indeed, O Messenger of Allah!"
He said, "Associating partners with Allah and disobedience to one’s parents."
❖ Definition of Disobedience to Parents (ʿUqūq al-Wālidayn):
As defined by scholars:
"ايذاؤهما بأى نوع كان من أنواع الأذى، قل أو كثر، نهيا عنه، أو مخالفتمها فيما يأمران أو ينهيان، بشرط انتفاء المعصية فى الكل"
“Causing harm to one's parents in any way, whether minor or major, and disobeying them in what they command or forbid (so long as it is not sinful), is considered disobedience.”
❖ Rights of the Wife and Children:
Islam commands that a husband must support his wife and children financially and emotionally.
Qur'anic Evidence:﴿وعلى المولود له رزقهن وكسوتهن بالمعروف﴾ (Al-Baqarah: 233)
“It is the duty of the father to provide for them and clothe them in a reasonable manner.”
﴿وعاشروهن بالمعروف﴾ (An-Nisāʾ: 19)
“And live with them in kindness.”
﴿فإمساك بمعروف أو تسريح بإحسان﴾ (Al-Baqarah: 229)
“Either retain [them] with kindness or release [them] with good treatment.”
Hadith:Narrated from Abū Hurayrah (رضي الله عنه):
"وَابْدَأْ بِمَنْ تَعُولُ..."
“Begin with those under your care…”
(Ṣaḥīḥ al-Bukhārī: Book of Nafaqāt, Chapter on Obligatory Spending, 6/189, 219; Book of Tafsīr, Sūrah Al-Mumtaḥanah, 6/62)
❖ Summary of the Person’s Condition:
Disobedient to his parents Does not provide for wife and children Causes them harm Financial responsibilities borne by his fatherSuch a person is:
◈ A violator of rights of others (ḥuqūq al-ʿibād)
◈ A ẓālim (oppressor)
◈ Guilty of major sins (kabā’ir)
❖ Types of Salvation and Conditions:
➊ The Righteous, Upright Believer:
– Never committed major sins
– Constantly engaged in righteous deeds
– Will attain immediate salvation after death:
◈ Protected from the torment of the grave, Barzakh, and the Day of Judgment
◈ Will enter Paradise without reckoning
➋ The Sinful Believer Who Repents:
– Committed sins
– Made sincere repentance (tawbah)
– Died upon repentance
– Will be granted salvation without punishment, by Allah’s mercy
➌ The Sinful Believer Without Repentance:
– Died without repenting
– His fate lies with Allah’s will (mashīʾah):
◈ If Allah wills, He may forgive him without punishment
◈ Or, He may punish him first —
▪ In the grave
▪ Or in both the grave and on the Day of Judgment
Regardless, eventual salvation is guaranteed due to his faith (īmān).
❖ Conclusion:
◈ This man is guilty of major sins.
◈ If he reforms himself and dies with sincere repentance, he will be granted immediate salvation (najāt ʾūlā).
◈ If he dies without repenting, his outcome will be subject to Allah’s decision:
"إن شاء عذبه، وإن شاء غفر له"
“If He wills, He will punish him, and if He wills, He will forgive him.”
*(Mufassal Reference: Muḥaddith Delhi, Vol. 8, Issue 1, Rabīʿ al-Awwal 1359 AH / May 1940)
ھذا ما عندي، والله أعلم بالصواب
