This excerpt is taken from Dr. Yusuf al-Qaradawi's book Halal and Haram in Islam, translated into Urdu by Muhammad Tahir Naqqash.
Social Relations
Islam has established mutual relations among members of society on two foundations:
◈ One is mutual brotherhood, which serves as a strong bond between each other.
◈ The other is rights and sanctities that Islam protects, meaning respect for every individual's life, honor, and property.
Islam declares forbidden every word, action, and behavior that harms or affects these fundamental relations, whether the harm is material or cultural; the degree of harm determines the level of prohibition. The following verses mention some forbidden things that damage mutual brotherhood and human sanctities. Allah Almighty says:
إِنَّمَا الْمُؤْمِنُونَ إِخْوَةٌ فَأَصْلِحُوا بَيْنَ أَخَوَيْكُمْ ۚ وَاتَّقُوا اللَّهَ لَعَلَّكُمْ تُرْحَمُونَ 10 يَا أَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا لَا يَسْخَرْ قَوْمٌ مِّن قَوْمٍ عَسَىٰ أَن يَكُونُوا خَيْرًا مِّنْهُمْ وَلَا نِسَاءٌ مِّن نِّسَاءٍ عَسَىٰ أَن يَكُنَّ خَيْرًا مِّنْهُنَّ ۖ وَلَا تَلْمِزُوا أَنفُسَكُمْ وَلَا تَنَابَزُوا بِالْأَلْقَابِ ۖ بِئْسَ الِاسْمُ الْفُسُوقُ بَعْدَ الْإِيمَانِ ۚ وَمَن لَّمْ يَتُبْ فَأُولَٰئِكَ هُمُ الظَّالِمُونَ 11 يَا أَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا اجْتَنِبُوا كَثِيرًا مِّنَ الظَّنِّ إِنَّ بَعْضَ الظَّنِّ إِثْمٌ ۖ وَلَا تَجَسَّسُوا وَلَا يَغْتَب بَّعْضُكُم بَعْضًا ۚ أَيُحِبُّ أَحَدُكُمْ أَن يَأْكُلَ لَحْمَ أَخِيهِ مَيْتًا فَكَرِهْتُمُوهُ ۚ وَاتَّقُوا اللَّهَ ۚ إِنَّ اللَّهَ تَوَّابٌ رَّحِيمٌ
“The believers are but brothers, so make peace between your brothers and fear Allah that you may receive mercy. O you who have believed, let not a people ridicule [another] people; perhaps they may be better than them. Nor let women ridicule [other] women; perhaps they may be better than them. And do not insult one another and do not call each other by [offensive] nicknames. Wretched is the name of disobedience after [one's] faith. And whoever does not repent - then it is those who are the wrongdoers. O you who have believed, avoid much [negative] assumption. Indeed, some assumption is sin. And do not spy or backbite each other. Would one of you like to eat the flesh of his brother when dead? You would detest it. And fear Allah; indeed, Allah is Accepting of Repentance and Merciful.”
Reference: (Surah Al-Hujurat: 10 to 12)
In the first verse, Allah Almighty states that the believers are brothers to one another. Within them, religious brotherhood is combined with human brotherhood. This brotherhood demands that they do not remain strangers to each other but become acquainted, do not sever ties but connect, do not fight or quarrel but live in harmony, do not harbor enmity but love one another, and do not differ but remain united. The hadith states:
لا تحاسدوا ولا تدابروا ولا تباغضوا وكونوا عباد الله إخوانا
“Do not envy one another, do not turn away from one another, and do not hate one another. But be, O servants of Allah, brothers to one another.”
Reference: Bukhari, Book of Manners, Chapter on Prohibition of Envy and Turning Away, Hadith: 6064; Muslim, Book of Virtue and Maintaining Ties, Chapter on Prohibition of Oppression and Spying, Hadith: 2563
It is not permissible to sever ties with a Muslim
On this basis, Islam has declared it forbidden to treat a Muslim brother harshly, to boycott him, or to be indifferent towards him. If enmity arises between two Muslims, they are given a maximum of three days to cool their anger. After that, they must necessarily try to reconcile. Accordingly, among the praiseworthy qualities of the believers mentioned in the Quran is this attribute:
اَذِلَّةٍ عَلَى الْمُؤْمِنِيْنَ
"Who are gentle with the believers."
Reference: (Surah Al-Ma'idah: 54)
And the Prophet ﷺ said:
لا يحل لمسلم أن يهجر أخاه فوق ثلاث، فإن مرت به ثلاث فليلقه فليسلم عليه، فإن رد عليه السلام فقد اشتركا فى الأجر وإن لم يرد عليه فقد باء بالاثم وخرج المسلم من الهجرة
"It is not permissible for a Muslim to cut off relations with his brother for more than three days. After that, he should meet him and greet him with salam. If he returns the salam, both will share the reward. If he does not respond, he will be deserving of sin, and the one who greets will be free from the sin of severing ties."
Reference: Abu Dawood, Book of Manners, Chapter on a man abandoning his brother, Hadith: 4912 - and its chain is weak
If a relative, with whom Islam has commanded maintaining kinship ties, is cut off, then its prohibition becomes even more severe. Allah says:
وَاتَّقُوا اللَّهَ الَّذِي تَسَاءَلُونَ بِهِ وَالْأَرْحَامَ إِنَّ اللَّهَ كَانَ عَلَيْكُمْ رَقِيباً
"And fear Allah, through whom you ask one another, and the wombs (kinship ties). Indeed Allah is ever, over you, an Observer."
Reference: (Surah An-Nisa: 1)
The Messenger of Allah ﷺ described maintaining kinship ties as follows:
الرحم معلقة بالعرش تقول، من وصلني وصله الله ومن قطعني قطعه الله
"The womb (kinship) is suspended from the Throne, saying: Whoever maintains me, Allah will maintain him, and whoever severs me, Allah will sever him."
Reference: Bukhari, Book of Manners, Chapter on maintaining ties, Hadith: 5988, 5989; Muslim, Book of Virtue and Maintaining Ties, Chapter on kinship ties, Hadith: 2555
He also said:
لا يدخل الجنة قاطع
"The one who severs ties (cuts kinship) will not enter Paradise."
Reference: Bukhari, Book of Manners, Chapter on the sin of severing ties, Hadith: 5984; Muslim, Book of Virtue and Maintaining Ties, Chapter on kinship ties, Hadith: 2556
Some scholars interpret "Qati'" as one who severs kinship ties, while others interpret it as "Qati' al-Tariq" (highway robber), and both are nearly the same.
Maintaining kinship does not mean that one relative deals with another on equal terms, that if he connects, then he connects, and if he treats well, then he treats well. This is natural. Rather, what is obligatory is that relatives be connected in any case, even if they sever ties. That is why the Prophet ﷺ said:
ليس الواصل بالمكافي ولكن الواصل الذى إذا قطعت رحمه وصلها
"The one who maintains kinship is not the one who reciprocates equally, but the one who maintains kinship is the one who connects the one who severs ties."
Reference: Bukhari, Book of Manners, Chapter on not reciprocating equally, Hadith: 5991
This applies when severing ties and boycotting are not for the sake of Allah, His path, or truth. Otherwise, the greatest means of strengthening faith is that love and hatred both be for Allah alone. Indeed, the Prophet ﷺ and the Companions, may Allah be pleased with them, boycotted three of their companions who did not participate in the Battle of Tabuk for fifty days. They ceased greeting and speaking to them until Allah revealed a verse pardoning their repentance.
Reference: Bukhari, Book of Military Expeditions, Chapter on the Hadith of Ka'b ibn Malik ibn al-Ruwaḥ: 4418; Muslim, Book of Repentance, Chapter on the repentance of Ka'b ibn Malik, Hadith: 2769
Similarly, the Prophet ﷺ separated from some of his pure wives for a month.
Reference: Bukhari, Book of Marriage, Chapter on the Prophet's migration from his wives: 5202; Muslim, Book of Fasting, Chapter on the month being twenty-nine days, Hadith: 1085, 1083. But this mentions a month (29 or 30) days. And Allah knows best
Sayyiduna Abdullah ibn Umar, may Allah be pleased with him, cut off relations with his son until his death because he did not consider a hadith of the Messenger of Allah ﷺ in which men were forbidden to prevent women from going to the mosque.
Reference: Musnad Ahmad: 2/36; also found in Muslim, Book of Prayer, Chapter on women going to mosques, Hadith: 442
But if severing ties and enmity are for worldly purposes, then this is a very despicable matter. How can a Muslim harbor enmity against his Muslim brother while as a result he is deprived of Allah's forgiveness and mercy? In an authentic hadith it is stated:
تفتح أبواب الجنة يوم الاثنين و الخميس فيغفر الله عزوجل لكل عبد لا يشرك بالله شيئا إلا رجلا كان بينه وبين أخيه شحناء فيقول: أنظروا هذين حتى يصطلحا أنظروا هذين حتى يصطلحا أنظروا هذين حتى يصطلحا
"The gates of Paradise are opened on Mondays and Thursdays, and Allah, the Mighty and Majestic, forgives every servant who does not associate anyone with Allah, except a man who has enmity with his brother. Allah says: Leave them until they reconcile, leave them until they reconcile, leave them until they reconcile."
Reference: Muslim, Book of Virtue and Maintaining Ties, Chapter on forbidding hatred, Hadith: 2565
And whoever is in the right, his brother's apology is sufficient for him. He should accept his brother's apology and end the dispute. Not accepting an apology and rejecting it is forbidden. The Prophet ﷺ warned that whoever does so will not reach the pond (Hawd) by his side on the Day of Judgment.
Reference: Majma' al-Zawa'id: 18, with reference to Tabarani in Al-Awsat: 21/2, Hadith: 1033, from Jabir and Aisha, may Allah be pleased with them: 6/160, Hadith: 6291; and their chains are weak
Mutual Reconciliation
Muslims who have discord among themselves should reconcile because this is the requirement of religious brotherhood. This responsibility also lies on the society because the Islamic society is a guarantor and helper for one another. Therefore, it is not appropriate for it to remain a mere spectator and leave some of its members in such a state that they keep fighting and quarreling, and the fire of enmity between them keeps burning or the gulf of hostility widens. It is the duty of the opinion leaders and the people of thought and wisdom in the society to intervene in this matter sincerely for the sake of truth and avoiding personal desires, and to try to correct the relations among Muslims. Allah Almighty says:
فَأَصْلِحُوا بَيْنَ أَخَوَيْكُمْ ۚ وَاتَّقُوا اللَّهَ لَعَلَّكُمْ تُرْحَمُونَ
"So make peace between your brothers and fear Allah that mercy may be shown to you."
Reference: (Surah Al-Hujurat: 10)
The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) has explained the virtue of reconciliation in a hadith and warned about the dangers of hatred and enmity. The Prophet (peace be upon him) said:
ألا أدلكم على أفضل من درجة الصلوة والصيام والصدقة؟ قالوا بلى يا رسول الله قال: إصلاح ذات البين فإن فساد ذات البين هى الحالقة، لا أقول إنها تحلق الشعر ولكن تحلق الدين
"Shall I not tell you of a deed that is superior to prayer, fasting, and charity?" The Companions (may Allah be pleased with them) said: "Certainly, O Messenger of Allah!" He said: "Reconciliation between people, for discord spoils relationships. It is not like shaving hair, but it shaves away religion."
Reference: Abu Dawood, Book of Manners, Chapter on Reconciliation, Hadith: 4919 - Tirmidhi, Book on the Description of the Day of Judgment, Chapter: 56, Hadith: 2509
