Source: Sermons of Ḥāfiẓ Muḥammad Isḥāq Zāhid
Compiled by: Tawḥīd Dot Com
Islam is a complete way of life that guides all aspects of human existence—individual, social, and family life. Nikāḥ (marriage) is a sacred and noble bond between a man and a woman through which a pure, peaceful, and dignified life becomes possible. This article provides comprehensive guidance on the legitimacy of marriage, its Sharʿī status, its benefits, its importance, and related Qur’ānic verses and Prophetic aḥādīth. It clarifies that marriage is not only a natural requirement but also the Sunnah of the Prophets, an essential part of the religion, and a strong means of social purity.
In Islam, marriage has been legislated for both men and women. Nikāḥ is a great and strong bond through which husband and wife live a pure and dignified life. This life contains love, compassion, affection, mutual cooperation, and shared joys and sorrows. If spouses live their married life in accordance with the pleasure of Allah Almighty, they can attain peace and tranquility in this world and the pleasure of Allah in the Hereafter.
﴿وَإِنْ خِفْتُمْ أَلَّا تُقْسِطُوا فِي الْيَتَامَىٰ فَانكِحُوا مَا طَابَ لَكُم مِّنَ النِّسَاءِ مَثْنَىٰ وَثُلَاثَ وَرُبَاعَ ۖ فَإِنْ خِفْتُمْ أَلَّا تَعْدِلُوا فَوَاحِدَةً أَوْ مَا مَلَكَتْ أَيْمَانُكُمْ ۚ ذَٰلِكَ أَدْنَىٰ أَلَّا تَعُولُوا﴾
Translation:
“And if you fear that you will not deal justly with the orphan girls, then marry those women who please you—two, three, or four. But if you fear that you will not be just, then marry only one, or those whom your right hands possess. That is more suitable to prevent injustice.”
This verse clearly shows that marriage is a command of Allah Almighty. However, marrying more than one wife is conditional upon justice, and if there is fear of injustice, one is instructed to suffice with one wife.
﴿وَأَنكِحُوا الْأَيَامَىٰ مِنكُمْ وَالصَّالِحِينَ مِنْ عِبَادِكُمْ وَإِمَائِكُمْ ۚ إِن يَكُونُوا فُقَرَاءَ يُغْنِهِمُ اللَّهُ مِن فَضْلِهِ ۗ وَاللَّهُ وَاسِعٌ عَلِيمٌ﴾
Translation:
“And marry off those among you who are unmarried, and the righteous among your male slaves and female slaves. If they are poor, Allah will enrich them from His bounty. And Allah is All-Encompassing, All-Knowing.”
These verses indicate that the command of marriage is general. According to some scholars, marriage is obligatory, while according to others it is recommended. However, if there is fear of falling into sin by not marrying, then marriage becomes obligatory.
The Messenger of Allah ﷺ said:
“Any woman who marries without the permission of her guardian, her marriage is invalid, her marriage is invalid, her marriage is invalid.”
“Three people are such whose help is guaranteed by Allah: the one who strives in the path of Allah, the slave who seeks emancipation and intends to fulfill it, and the one who marries intending chastity.”
Allah Almighty says:
﴿وَلَقَدْ أَرْسَلْنَا رُسُلًا مِّن قَبْلِكَ وَجَعَلْنَا لَهُمْ أَزْوَاجًا وَذُرِّيَّةً﴾
Translation:
“And indeed, We sent Messengers before you, and We made for them wives and offspring.”
❀ This verse mentions two issues:
① The Jews used to object to the Prophet ﷺ, saying: What kind of Prophet is this who marries? If he were truly a Prophet, he would be devoted solely to worship.
② Allah Almighty clarified through this verse that all the Prophets and Messengers had wives and children; therefore, marriage is not contrary to Prophethood but rather the Sunnah of the Prophets.
③ This verse also contains encouragement towards marriage.
Ḥaḍrat Anas ibn Mālik رضي الله عنه narrates that some Companions asked the wives of the Prophet ﷺ about his acts of worship. When they were informed, they considered them (in their view) insufficient and said:
❀ One said: I will pray all night continuously.
❀ Another said: I will fast continuously and never break my fast.
❀ A third said: I will stay away from women and never marry.
When this reached the Messenger of Allah ﷺ, he said:
“Are you the ones who said such and such? By Allah! I am the one who fears Allah the most among you and am most conscious of Him, yet I fast and break my fast, I pray and I sleep, and I marry women. So whoever turns away from my Sunnah is not from me.”
“When a servant marries, he has completed half of his religion, so let him fear Allah regarding the remaining half.”
Another narration states:
“Whomever Allah grants a righteous wife, He has helped him with half of his religion; so let him fear Allah in the remaining half.”
“Four things are from happiness: a righteous wife, a spacious home, a righteous neighbor, and a comfortable mount.”
Allah Almighty says:
﴿هُوَ الَّذِي خَلَقَكُم مِّن نَّفْسٍ وَاحِدَةٍ وَجَعَلَ مِنْهَا زَوْجَهَا لِيَسْكُنَ إِلَيْهَا﴾
Translation:
“He is the One Who created you from a single soul and made from it its spouse so that he may find tranquility in her.”
The Messenger of Allah ﷺ said:
“From your world, three things have been made beloved to me: perfume, women, and the coolness of my eyes has been placed in prayer.”
This is a natural reality that Allah Almighty has placed attraction between man and woman, and this natural need can only be fulfilled in a lawful and pure manner through marriage.
Ḥaḍrat Maʿqil ibn Yasār رضي الله عنه narrated that a man said: I have found a beautiful woman from a noble family, but she is barren—should I marry her? The Prophet ﷺ forbade him. When he came a third time, the Prophet ﷺ said:
“Marry women who are loving and fertile, for I will boast of your great numbers before the other nations.”
If the children are righteous, they become a continuous charity for their parents, and even if they pass away during the parents’ lifetime, they become a means of reward.
The Messenger of Allah ﷺ said:
“There is no Muslim whose three children die before reaching puberty except that Allah admits him into Paradise by virtue of His mercy upon them.”
Another narration states:
“Any woman whose three children die will have them as a shield from the Fire.”
A woman asked: And two?
He said: “And two as well.”
ʿAbdullāh ibn Masʿūd رضي الله عنه narrated that the Messenger of Allah ﷺ said:
“O young people! Whoever among you can afford marriage, let him marry, for it lowers the gaze and guards chastity. And whoever cannot afford it, let him fast, for fasting is a shield for him.”
The Messenger of Allah ﷺ said:
The Companions asked: O Messenger of Allah! If one of us fulfills his desire, will he have a reward?
He ﷺ said:
“Tell me, if he were to fulfill it in something unlawful, would he not bear sin? Likewise, when he fulfills it in what is lawful, he has a reward.”
Islam has set the criterion of marriage as religion and character, not wealth and worldly status.
The Messenger of Allah ﷺ said:
“When someone comes to you with a proposal whose religion and character you are pleased with, then marry your daughter to him. If you do not do so, there will be widespread fitnah and corruption on the earth.”
This ḥadīth is clear evidence that giving preference to worldly standards leads to social corruption, which is evident everywhere today.
“By Allah! A person like you cannot be rejected, but you are a disbeliever and I am a Muslim woman; it is not lawful for me to marry you. If you accept Islam, that will be my mahr.”
So Abū Ṭalḥah رضي الله عنه accepted Islam, and his Islam became the mahr of Umm Sulaym رضي الله عنها.
This incident is a clear proof that in Islam, the real criterion is religion, not wealth.
“A woman is married for four reasons: her wealth, her lineage, her beauty, and her religion. So choose the one with religion; may your hands be dusted.”
Similarly, a righteous wife has been described as the best treasure:
“Shall I not inform you of the best treasure? A righteous wife: when he looks at her, she pleases him; when he is absent, she protects him; and when he commands her, she obeys him.”
Allah Almighty says:
﴿وَكَيْفَ تَأْخُذُونَهُ وَقَدْ أَفْضَىٰ بَعْضُكُمْ إِلَىٰ بَعْضٍ وَأَخَذْنَ مِنكُم مِّيثَاقًا غَلِيظًا﴾
Translation:
“And how could you take it back when you have gone in unto one another and they have taken from you a firm covenant?”
“Fear Allah regarding women, for you have taken them as a trust from Allah, and you have made their private parts lawful by the word of Allah.”
Allah Almighty says:
﴿فَإِمْسَاكٌ بِمَعْرُوفٍ أَوْ تَسْرِيحٌ بِإِحْسَانٍ﴾
Translation:
“Either retain them in kindness or release them with good treatment.”
Allah Almighty says:
﴿وَمِنْ آيَاتِهِ أَنْ خَلَقَ لَكُم مِّنْ أَنفُسِكُمْ أَزْوَاجًا لِّتَسْكُنُوا إِلَيْهَا وَجَعَلَ بَيْنَكُم مَّوَدَّةً وَرَحْمَةً﴾
Translation:
“And among His signs is that He created for you from yourselves spouses that you may find tranquility in them, and He placed between you affection and mercy.”
The Messenger of Allah ﷺ said:
“Nothing like marriage has been seen for two who love one another.”
“I would drink water while I was menstruating, then I would give the same cup to the Messenger of Allah ﷺ, and he would place his mouth at the same spot from which I had drunk.”
In another narration, she mentioned that she raced with the Prophet ﷺ; once she won and another time the Prophet ﷺ won, and he said:
“This victory is for that one.”
These narrations show that love, good humor, and mutual respect are the soul of married life.
Ḥaḍrat Khadījah رضي الله عنها comforted him and said:
“Never! By Allah, Allah will never disgrace you. You maintain family ties, speak the truth, bear the burden of the weak, give to the needy, honor guests, and help in times of hardship.”
This is the best example of how a wife can be a source of support for her husband.
Allah Almighty says:
﴿وَلَهُنَّ مِثْلُ الَّذِي عَلَيْهِنَّ بِالْمَعْرُوفِ وَلِلرِّجَالِ عَلَيْهِنَّ دَرَجَةٌ﴾
Translation:
“And for women are rights similar to those upon them according to what is reasonable, but men have a degree over them.”
In the Farewell Sermon, the Messenger of Allah ﷺ said:
“Beware! You have rights over your wives, and your wives have rights over you.”
① Mutual rights
② Rights of the husband
③ Rights of the wife
This article discusses the mutual rights, which include:
The Messenger of Allah ﷺ said:
“The conditions most deserving of being fulfilled are those by which you made the private parts lawful.”
However, any condition that contradicts Sharīʿah is invalid.
The Messenger of Allah ﷺ said:
“Every condition that is not in the Book of Allah is invalid.”
The Messenger of Allah ﷺ said:
“When a man calls his wife to his bed and she refuses, and he spends the night angry with her, the angels curse her until morning.”
Allah Almighty says:
﴿هُنَّ لِبَاسٌ لَّكُمْ وَأَنتُمْ لِبَاسٌ لَّهُنَّ﴾
Translation:
“They are a garment for you, and you are a garment for them.”
The Messenger of Allah ﷺ said:
“Among the worst people in status before Allah on the Day of Resurrection is the man who has intimacy with his wife and she with him, then he spreads her secrets.”
Allah Almighty says:
﴿وَلَكُمْ نِصْفُ مَا تَرَكَ أَزْوَاجُكُمْ إِن لَّمْ يَكُن لَّهُنَّ وَلَدٌ…﴾
Translation:
“And for you is half of what your wives leave if they have no child… and for wives are prescribed shares likewise, after the fulfillment of bequests and debts.”
Compiled by: Tawḥīd Dot Com
Islam is a complete way of life that guides all aspects of human existence—individual, social, and family life. Nikāḥ (marriage) is a sacred and noble bond between a man and a woman through which a pure, peaceful, and dignified life becomes possible. This article provides comprehensive guidance on the legitimacy of marriage, its Sharʿī status, its benefits, its importance, and related Qur’ānic verses and Prophetic aḥādīth. It clarifies that marriage is not only a natural requirement but also the Sunnah of the Prophets, an essential part of the religion, and a strong means of social purity.
The Legitimacy and Importance of Nikāḥ
O Brothers in Islam!In Islam, marriage has been legislated for both men and women. Nikāḥ is a great and strong bond through which husband and wife live a pure and dignified life. This life contains love, compassion, affection, mutual cooperation, and shared joys and sorrows. If spouses live their married life in accordance with the pleasure of Allah Almighty, they can attain peace and tranquility in this world and the pleasure of Allah in the Hereafter.
Evidence of Nikāḥ from the Qur’an
Allah Almighty says:﴿وَإِنْ خِفْتُمْ أَلَّا تُقْسِطُوا فِي الْيَتَامَىٰ فَانكِحُوا مَا طَابَ لَكُم مِّنَ النِّسَاءِ مَثْنَىٰ وَثُلَاثَ وَرُبَاعَ ۖ فَإِنْ خِفْتُمْ أَلَّا تَعْدِلُوا فَوَاحِدَةً أَوْ مَا مَلَكَتْ أَيْمَانُكُمْ ۚ ذَٰلِكَ أَدْنَىٰ أَلَّا تَعُولُوا﴾
Reference: An-Nisā’: 4/3
Translation:
“And if you fear that you will not deal justly with the orphan girls, then marry those women who please you—two, three, or four. But if you fear that you will not be just, then marry only one, or those whom your right hands possess. That is more suitable to prevent injustice.”
This verse clearly shows that marriage is a command of Allah Almighty. However, marrying more than one wife is conditional upon justice, and if there is fear of injustice, one is instructed to suffice with one wife.
The General Command of Nikāḥ
Allah Almighty says elsewhere:﴿وَأَنكِحُوا الْأَيَامَىٰ مِنكُمْ وَالصَّالِحِينَ مِنْ عِبَادِكُمْ وَإِمَائِكُمْ ۚ إِن يَكُونُوا فُقَرَاءَ يُغْنِهِمُ اللَّهُ مِن فَضْلِهِ ۗ وَاللَّهُ وَاسِعٌ عَلِيمٌ﴾
Reference: An-Nūr: 24/32
Translation:
“And marry off those among you who are unmarried, and the righteous among your male slaves and female slaves. If they are poor, Allah will enrich them from His bounty. And Allah is All-Encompassing, All-Knowing.”
These verses indicate that the command of marriage is general. According to some scholars, marriage is obligatory, while according to others it is recommended. However, if there is fear of falling into sin by not marrying, then marriage becomes obligatory.
The Condition of the Guardian’s Permission
This verse also indicates that a woman cannot marry without the permission of her guardian (walī).The Messenger of Allah ﷺ said:
Translation:(( أَيُّمَا امْرَأَةٍ نَكَحَتْ بِغَيْرِ إِذْنِ وَلِيِّهَا فَنِكَاحُهَا بَاطِلٌ، فَنِكَاحُهَا بَاطِلٌ، فَنِكَاحُهَا بَاطِلٌ ))
Reference: Musnad Aḥmad; Sunan Abī Dāwūd; Jāmiʿ at-Tirmidhī; Sunan Ibn Mājah – Ṣaḥīḥ al-Jāmiʿ: 2709
“Any woman who marries without the permission of her guardian, her marriage is invalid, her marriage is invalid, her marriage is invalid.”
Poverty Is Not an Obstacle to Marriage
Allah Almighty has promised that if those who marry are poor, He will enrich them from His bounty. This meaning is supported by the following ḥadīth of the Messenger of Allah ﷺ:Translation:(( ثَلَاثَةٌ حَقٌّ عَلَى اللَّهِ عَوْنُهُمْ: الْمُجَاهِدُ فِي سَبِيلِ اللَّهِ، وَالْمُكَاتِبُ الَّذِي يُرِيدُ الْأَدَاءَ، وَالنَّاكِحُ الَّذِي يُرِيدُ الْعَفَافَ ))
Reference: Musnad Aḥmad; Jāmiʿ at-Tirmidhī; Sunan an-Nasā’ī – Ṣaḥīḥ al-Jāmiʿ: 3050
“Three people are such whose help is guaranteed by Allah: the one who strives in the path of Allah, the slave who seeks emancipation and intends to fulfill it, and the one who marries intending chastity.”
Nikāḥ Is the Sunnah of the Prophets
In Islam, marriage is not merely a social contract; rather, it is the Sunnah of all the Prophets and Messengers. Allah Almighty has clearly stated that He did not keep His Messengers celibate, but rather granted them spouses and offspring.Allah Almighty says:
﴿وَلَقَدْ أَرْسَلْنَا رُسُلًا مِّن قَبْلِكَ وَجَعَلْنَا لَهُمْ أَزْوَاجًا وَذُرِّيَّةً﴾
Reference: Ar-Raʿd: 13/38
Translation:
“And indeed, We sent Messengers before you, and We made for them wives and offspring.”
Explanation of Tafsīr al-Qurṭubī
Imām al-Qurṭubī رحمه الله states in the explanation of this verse:❀ This verse mentions two issues:
① The Jews used to object to the Prophet ﷺ, saying: What kind of Prophet is this who marries? If he were truly a Prophet, he would be devoted solely to worship.
② Allah Almighty clarified through this verse that all the Prophets and Messengers had wives and children; therefore, marriage is not contrary to Prophethood but rather the Sunnah of the Prophets.
③ This verse also contains encouragement towards marriage.
Reference: Tafsīr al-Qurṭubī: 9/327
Nikāḥ Is the Sunnah of the Messenger of Allah ﷺ
The Messenger of Allah ﷺ declared marriage to be his Sunnah and strongly warned those who turn away from it.Ḥaḍrat Anas ibn Mālik رضي الله عنه narrates that some Companions asked the wives of the Prophet ﷺ about his acts of worship. When they were informed, they considered them (in their view) insufficient and said:
❀ One said: I will pray all night continuously.
❀ Another said: I will fast continuously and never break my fast.
❀ A third said: I will stay away from women and never marry.
When this reached the Messenger of Allah ﷺ, he said:
Translation:(( أَنْتُمُ الَّذِينَ قُلْتُمْ كَذَا وَكَذَا؟ أَمَا وَاللَّهِ إِنِّي لَأَخْشَاكُمْ لِلَّهِ وَأَتْقَاكُمْ لَهُ، لَكِنِّي أَصُومُ وَأُفْطِرُ، وَأُصَلِّي وَأَرْقُدُ، وَأَتَزَوَّجُ النِّسَاءَ، فَمَنْ رَغِبَ عَنْ سُنَّتِي فَلَيْسَ مِنِّي ))
Reference: Ṣaḥīḥ al-Bukhārī: 5063; Ṣaḥīḥ Muslim: 1401
“Are you the ones who said such and such? By Allah! I am the one who fears Allah the most among you and am most conscious of Him, yet I fast and break my fast, I pray and I sleep, and I marry women. So whoever turns away from my Sunnah is not from me.”
Nikāḥ Is Half of the Religion
The Messenger of Allah ﷺ said:Translation:(( إِذَا تَزَوَّجَ الْعَبْدُ فَقَدِ اسْتَكْمَلَ نِصْفَ الدِّينِ، فَلْيَتَّقِ اللَّهَ فِي النِّصْفِ الْبَاقِي ))
Reference: Ṣaḥīḥ at-Targhīb wa at-Tarhīb (al-Albānī): 1916
“When a servant marries, he has completed half of his religion, so let him fear Allah regarding the remaining half.”
Another narration states:
Translation:(( مَنْ رَزَقَهُ اللَّهُ امْرَأَةً صَالِحَةً فَقَدْ أَعَانَهُ عَلَى شَطْرِ دِينِهِ، فَلْيَتَّقِ اللَّهَ فِي الشَّطْرِ الْبَاقِي ))
“Whomever Allah grants a righteous wife, He has helped him with half of his religion; so let him fear Allah in the remaining half.”
A Righteous Wife Is a Sign of Good Fortune
The Messenger of Allah ﷺ said:Translation:(( أَرْبَعٌ مِنَ السَّعَادَةِ: الْمَرْأَةُ الصَّالِحَةُ، وَالْمَسْكَنُ الْوَاسِعُ، وَالْجَارُ الصَّالِحُ، وَالْمَرْكَبُ الْهَنِيءُ ))
Reference: Ṣaḥīḥ at-Targhīb wa at-Tarhīb (al-Albānī): 914
“Four things are from happiness: a righteous wife, a spacious home, a righteous neighbor, and a comfortable mount.”
The Benefits of Nikāḥ
Islam has legislated marriage with many great objectives and benefits in view. These benefits deeply affect the individual, the family, and society as a whole. Below are some major benefits of marriage mentioned in the light of the Qur’an and Sunnah:➊ Tranquility and Peace Through Marriage
Allah Almighty has made man and woman a source of tranquility for one another. The greatest benefit of married life is peace of the heart and mental serenity.Allah Almighty says:
﴿هُوَ الَّذِي خَلَقَكُم مِّن نَّفْسٍ وَاحِدَةٍ وَجَعَلَ مِنْهَا زَوْجَهَا لِيَسْكُنَ إِلَيْهَا﴾
Reference: Al-Aʿrāf: 7/189
Translation:
“He is the One Who created you from a single soul and made from it its spouse so that he may find tranquility in her.”
The Messenger of Allah ﷺ said:
Translation:(( حُبِّبَ إِلَيَّ مِنْ دُنْيَاكُمْ ثَلَاثٌ: الطِّيبُ، وَالنِّسَاءُ، وَجُعِلَتْ قُرَّةُ عَيْنِي فِي الصَّلَاةِ ))
Reference: Musnad Aḥmad; Sunan an-Nasā’ī – Ṣaḥīḥ al-Jāmiʿ (al-Albānī): 3124
“From your world, three things have been made beloved to me: perfume, women, and the coolness of my eyes has been placed in prayer.”
This is a natural reality that Allah Almighty has placed attraction between man and woman, and this natural need can only be fulfilled in a lawful and pure manner through marriage.
➋ Preservation of Human Lineage
The survival of humanity and the increase of the Ummah of Muḥammad ﷺ are possible only through marriage. That is why the Messenger of Allah ﷺ encouraged marrying women who are loving and fertile.Ḥaḍrat Maʿqil ibn Yasār رضي الله عنه narrated that a man said: I have found a beautiful woman from a noble family, but she is barren—should I marry her? The Prophet ﷺ forbade him. When he came a third time, the Prophet ﷺ said:
Translation:(( تَزَوَّجُوا الْوَدُودَ الْوَلُودَ، فَإِنِّي مُكَاثِرٌ بِكُمُ الْأُمَمَ ))
Reference: Sunan Abī Dāwūd: 2050; Sunan an-Nasā’ī; Ibn Ḥibbān: 4056; Ṣaḥīḥ Sunan Abī Dāwūd (al-Albānī): 1805
“Marry women who are loving and fertile, for I will boast of your great numbers before the other nations.”
If the children are righteous, they become a continuous charity for their parents, and even if they pass away during the parents’ lifetime, they become a means of reward.
The Messenger of Allah ﷺ said:
Translation:(( مَا مِنَ النَّاسِ مِنْ مُسْلِمٍ يُتَوَفَّى لَهُ ثَلَاثٌ لَمْ يَبْلُغُوا الْحِنْثَ أَدْخَلَهُ اللَّهُ الْجَنَّةَ بِفَضْلِ رَحْمَتِهِ إِيَّاهُمْ ))
Reference: Ṣaḥīḥ al-Bukhārī: 1248, 1381
“There is no Muslim whose three children die before reaching puberty except that Allah admits him into Paradise by virtue of His mercy upon them.”
Another narration states:
Translation:(( أَيُّمَا امْرَأَةٍ مَاتَ لَهَا ثَلَاثَةٌ مِنَ الْوَلَدِ كَانُوا لَهَا حِجَابًا مِنَ النَّارِ ))
A woman asked: And two?
He ﷺ said: (( وَاثْنَانِ ))
Reference: Ṣaḥīḥ al-Bukhārī: 1249; Ṣaḥīḥ Muslim: 2633
“Any woman whose three children die will have them as a shield from the Fire.”
A woman asked: And two?
He said: “And two as well.”
➌ Protection of Gaze and Chastity
Marriage is a strong means of protection from immorality and a safeguard for chastity.ʿAbdullāh ibn Masʿūd رضي الله عنه narrated that the Messenger of Allah ﷺ said:
Translation:(( يَا مَعْشَرَ الشَّبَابِ! مَنِ اسْتَطَاعَ الْبَاءَةَ فَلْيَتَزَوَّجْ، فَإِنَّهُ أَغَضُّ لِلْبَصَرِ، وَأَحْصَنُ لِلْفَرْجِ، وَمَنْ لَّمْ يَسْتَطِعْ فَعَلَيْهِ بِالصَّوْمِ فَإِنَّهُ لَهُ وِجَاءٌ ))
Reference: Ṣaḥīḥ al-Bukhārī: 6066
“O young people! Whoever among you can afford marriage, let him marry, for it lowers the gaze and guards chastity. And whoever cannot afford it, let him fast, for fasting is a shield for him.”
➍ Marriage Is Obedience to Allah and His Messenger ﷺ
In Islam, marriage is not merely a worldly need; rather, it is obedience to Allah and His Messenger ﷺ. Allah Almighty has promised a pure life and great reward for obedience. Moreover, lawful marital relations between husband and wife are also considered acts of worship.The Messenger of Allah ﷺ said:
“And in the private part of each one of you is charity.”(( وَفِي بُضْعِ أَحَدِكُمْ صَدَقَةٌ ))
The Companions asked: O Messenger of Allah! If one of us fulfills his desire, will he have a reward?
He ﷺ said:
Translation:(( أَرَأَيْتُمْ لَوْ وَضَعَهَا فِي حَرَامٍ أَكَانَ عَلَيْهِ وِزْرٌ؟ فَكَذَلِكَ إِذَا وَضَعَهَا فِي الْحَلَالِ كَانَ لَهُ أَجْرٌ ))
Reference: Ṣaḥīḥ Muslim: 1006
“Tell me, if he were to fulfill it in something unlawful, would he not bear sin? Likewise, when he fulfills it in what is lawful, he has a reward.”
The Harm of Delaying Marriage
In view of these great benefits of marriage, delaying marriage without a valid reason is not correct. Especially guardians bear the responsibility of not delaying the marriages of their young children unnecessarily. Unfortunately, many parents today prioritize worldly standards—wealth, property, excessive dowry or mahr—which is contrary to the spirit of Sharīʿah.Islam has set the criterion of marriage as religion and character, not wealth and worldly status.
The Messenger of Allah ﷺ said:
Translation:(( إِذَا أَتَاكُمْ مَنْ تَرْضَوْنَ خُلُقَهُ وَدِينَهُ فَزَوِّجُوهُ، إِلَّا تَفْعَلُوا تَكُنْ فِتْنَةٌ فِي الْأَرْضِ وَفَسَادٌ عَرِيضٌ ))
Reference: Ṣaḥīḥ al-Jāmiʿ (al-Albānī): 270; as-Silsilah aṣ-Ṣaḥīḥah: 1022
“When someone comes to you with a proposal whose religion and character you are pleased with, then marry your daughter to him. If you do not do so, there will be widespread fitnah and corruption on the earth.”
This ḥadīth is clear evidence that giving preference to worldly standards leads to social corruption, which is evident everywhere today.
Practical Example of the Female Companions
Ḥaḍrat Anas رضي الله عنه narrated that Abū Ṭalḥah رضي الله عنه sent a marriage proposal to Umm Sulaym رضي الله عنها. She said:“By Allah! A person like you cannot be rejected, but you are a disbeliever and I am a Muslim woman; it is not lawful for me to marry you. If you accept Islam, that will be my mahr.”
So Abū Ṭalḥah رضي الله عنه accepted Islam, and his Islam became the mahr of Umm Sulaym رضي الله عنها.
Reference: Fatḥ al-Bārī: 9/18; Sunan an-Nasā’ī with a sound chain
This incident is a clear proof that in Islam, the real criterion is religion, not wealth.
Sharʿī Criteria for Choosing a Wife
The Messenger of Allah ﷺ said:Translation:(( تُنْكَحُ الْمَرْأَةُ لِأَرْبَعٍ: لِمَالِهَا، وَلِحَسَبِهَا، وَلِجَمَالِهَا، وَلِدِينِهَا، فَاظْفَرْ بِذَاتِ الدِّينِ تَرِبَتْ يَدَاكَ ))
Reference: Muttafaqun ʿAlayh
“A woman is married for four reasons: her wealth, her lineage, her beauty, and her religion. So choose the one with religion; may your hands be dusted.”
Similarly, a righteous wife has been described as the best treasure:
Translation:(( أَلَا أُخْبِرُكُمْ بِخَيْرِ مَا يُكْنَزُ؟ الْمَرْأَةُ الصَّالِحَةُ، إِذَا نَظَرَ إِلَيْهَا سَرَّتْهُ، وَإِذَا غَابَ عَنْهَا حَفِظَتْهُ، وَإِذَا أَمَرَهَا أَطَاعَتْهُ ))
Reference: Sunan Abī Dāwūd: 1664
“Shall I not inform you of the best treasure? A righteous wife: when he looks at her, she pleases him; when he is absent, she protects him; and when he commands her, she obeys him.”
Principles of a Successful Married Life (Introduction)
Now we turn to those principles by acting upon which husband and wife can make their married life pleasant and successful. These principles are derived from the Qur’an and Sunnah and are proven in practical life.Basic Principles of a Successful Married Life
Islam has outlined certain basic principles to make married life pleasant and successful. If husband and wife adhere to these principles, their life can be filled with peace, love, and mutual respect.➊ Fulfilling the Covenant
Nikāḥ is, in reality, a strong and binding covenant between husband and wife. Fulfilling this covenant is the foundation of a successful married life.Allah Almighty says:
﴿وَكَيْفَ تَأْخُذُونَهُ وَقَدْ أَفْضَىٰ بَعْضُكُمْ إِلَىٰ بَعْضٍ وَأَخَذْنَ مِنكُم مِّيثَاقًا غَلِيظًا﴾
Reference: An-Nisā’: 4/21
Translation:
“And how could you take it back when you have gone in unto one another and they have taken from you a firm covenant?”
Explanation of “Mīthāq Ghalīẓ”
Imām Ibn Jarīr aṭ-Ṭabarī رحمه الله stated that “Mīthāq Ghalīẓ” refers to the covenant taken from the man at the time of marriage that he will either keep his wife in a good manner or release her with kindness.
Reference: Jāmiʿ al-Bayān: 4/316
The Prophet’s ﷺ Advice Regarding Women
In the Farewell Sermon, the Messenger of Allah ﷺ said:Translation:(( فَاتَّقُوا اللَّهَ فِي النِّسَاءِ، فَإِنَّكُمْ أَخَذْتُمُوهُنَّ بِأَمَانِ اللَّهِ، وَاسْتَحْلَلْتُمْ فُرُوجَهُنَّ بِكَلِمَةِ اللَّهِ ))
Reference: Ṣaḥīḥ Muslim: 1218
“Fear Allah regarding women, for you have taken them as a trust from Allah, and you have made their private parts lawful by the word of Allah.”
Allah Almighty says:
﴿فَإِمْسَاكٌ بِمَعْرُوفٍ أَوْ تَسْرِيحٌ بِإِحْسَانٍ﴾
Reference: Al-Baqarah: 2/229
Translation:
“Either retain them in kindness or release them with good treatment.”
➋ Love and Mercy Between Husband and Wife
Allah Almighty has placed love and mercy as the foundation of married life.Allah Almighty says:
﴿وَمِنْ آيَاتِهِ أَنْ خَلَقَ لَكُم مِّنْ أَنفُسِكُمْ أَزْوَاجًا لِّتَسْكُنُوا إِلَيْهَا وَجَعَلَ بَيْنَكُم مَّوَدَّةً وَرَحْمَةً﴾
Reference: Ar-Rūm: 30/21
Translation:
“And among His signs is that He created for you from yourselves spouses that you may find tranquility in them, and He placed between you affection and mercy.”
The Messenger of Allah ﷺ said:
Translation:(( لَمْ يُرَ لِلْمُتَحَابَّيْنِ مِثْلُ النِّكَاحِ ))
Reference: Ṣaḥīḥ al-Jāmiʿ (al-Albānī): 5200; as-Silsilah aṣ-Ṣaḥīḥah: 624
“Nothing like marriage has been seen for two who love one another.”
The Prophet’s ﷺ Example of Love
ʿĀ’ishah رضي الله عنها said:“I would drink water while I was menstruating, then I would give the same cup to the Messenger of Allah ﷺ, and he would place his mouth at the same spot from which I had drunk.”
Reference: Ṣaḥīḥ Muslim: 300
In another narration, she mentioned that she raced with the Prophet ﷺ; once she won and another time the Prophet ﷺ won, and he said:
Translation:(( هَذِهِ بِتِلْكَ ))
Reference: Musnad Aḥmad: 6/39; Sunan Abī Dāwūd: 2578; Sunan Ibn Mājah: 1979; Ṣaḥīḥ Abī Dāwūd (al-Albānī): 2248
“This victory is for that one.”
These narrations show that love, good humor, and mutual respect are the soul of married life.
➌ Husband and Wife as Companions in Hardship
The beauty of married life lies in husband and wife considering each other’s pain as their own.The Example of Ḥaḍrat Khadījah رضي الله عنها
When the first revelation descended, the Messenger of Allah ﷺ returned home in a state of fear and said:(( زَمِّلُونِي، زَمِّلُونِي ))
“Cover me, cover me.”
Reference: Ṣaḥīḥ al-Bukhārī: 3; Ṣaḥīḥ Muslim: 16
Ḥaḍrat Khadījah رضي الله عنها comforted him and said:
Translation:(( كَلَّا، وَاللَّهِ لَا يُخْزِيكَ اللَّهُ أَبَدًا… ))
“Never! By Allah, Allah will never disgrace you. You maintain family ties, speak the truth, bear the burden of the weak, give to the needy, honor guests, and help in times of hardship.”
This is the best example of how a wife can be a source of support for her husband.
➍ Mutual Fulfillment of Rights
For a successful and pleasant married life, it is essential that husband and wife recognize and fulfill each other’s rights—neither neglecting the rights of the other.Allah Almighty says:
﴿وَلَهُنَّ مِثْلُ الَّذِي عَلَيْهِنَّ بِالْمَعْرُوفِ وَلِلرِّجَالِ عَلَيْهِنَّ دَرَجَةٌ﴾
Reference: Al-Baqarah: 2/228
Translation:
“And for women are rights similar to those upon them according to what is reasonable, but men have a degree over them.”
In the Farewell Sermon, the Messenger of Allah ﷺ said:
Translation:(( أَلَا إِنَّ لَكُمْ عَلَىٰ نِسَائِكُمْ حَقًّا، وَلِنِسَائِكُمْ عَلَيْكُمْ حَقًّا ))
Reference: Ṣaḥīḥ at-Targhīb wa at-Tarhīb (al-Albānī): 1930
“Beware! You have rights over your wives, and your wives have rights over you.”
Categories of Mutual Rights
The rights between husband and wife can be divided into three categories:① Mutual rights
② Rights of the husband
③ Rights of the wife
This article discusses the mutual rights, which include:
➊ Fulfilling Agreed Conditions of Marriage
Any lawful conditions agreed upon at the time of marriage are binding upon both spouses.The Messenger of Allah ﷺ said:
Translation:(( أَحَقُّ مَا أَوْفَيْتُمْ مِنَ الشُّرُوطِ أَنْ تُوفُوا بِهِ مَا اسْتَحْلَلْتُمْ بِهِ الْفُرُوجَ ))
Reference: Ṣaḥīḥ al-Bukhārī: 5151; Ṣaḥīḥ Muslim: 1418
“The conditions most deserving of being fulfilled are those by which you made the private parts lawful.”
However, any condition that contradicts Sharīʿah is invalid.
The Messenger of Allah ﷺ said:
Translation:(( كُلُّ شَرْطٍ لَيْسَ فِي كِتَابِ اللَّهِ فَهُوَ بَاطِلٌ ))
Reference: Musnad Aḥmad: 6/213; Sunan Ibn Mājah: 2521; Ṣaḥīḥ al-Bukhārī: 5152; Ṣaḥīḥ Muslim: 1408
“Every condition that is not in the Book of Allah is invalid.”
➋ Mutual Intimacy
Fulfilling natural desires in marital relations is a mutual right of husband and wife.The Messenger of Allah ﷺ said:
Translation:(( إِذَا دَعَا الرَّجُلُ امْرَأَتَهُ إِلَىٰ فِرَاشِهِ فَأَبَتْ، فَبَاتَ غَضْبَانَ عَلَيْهَا، لَعَنَتْهَا الْمَلَائِكَةُ حَتَّىٰ تُصْبِحَ ))
Reference: Jāmiʿ at-Tirmidhī; Sunan an-Nasā’ī – Ṣaḥīḥ at-Targhīb wa at-Tarhīb (al-Albānī): 1946
“When a man calls his wife to his bed and she refuses, and he spends the night angry with her, the angels curse her until morning.”
➌ Marital Privacy
It is obligatory upon husband and wife to maintain privacy regarding their marital relations.Allah Almighty says:
﴿هُنَّ لِبَاسٌ لَّكُمْ وَأَنتُمْ لِبَاسٌ لَّهُنَّ﴾
Reference: Al-Baqarah: 2/187
Translation:
“They are a garment for you, and you are a garment for them.”
The Messenger of Allah ﷺ said:
Translation:(( إِنَّ مِنْ أَشَرِّ النَّاسِ عِنْدَ اللَّهِ مَنْزِلَةً يَوْمَ الْقِيَامَةِ الرَّجُلُ يُفْضِي إِلَىٰ امْرَأَتِهِ وَتُفْضِي إِلَيْهِ، ثُمَّ يَنْشُرُ سِرَّهَا ))
Reference: Ṣaḥīḥ Muslim: 1437
“Among the worst people in status before Allah on the Day of Resurrection is the man who has intimacy with his wife and she with him, then he spreads her secrets.”
➍ Right of Inheritance
An important mutual right between husband and wife is inheritance.Allah Almighty says:
﴿وَلَكُمْ نِصْفُ مَا تَرَكَ أَزْوَاجُكُمْ إِن لَّمْ يَكُن لَّهُنَّ وَلَدٌ…﴾
Reference: An-Nisā’: 4/12
Translation:
“And for you is half of what your wives leave if they have no child… and for wives are prescribed shares likewise, after the fulfillment of bequests and debts.”