This excerpt is taken from Dr. Yusuf Al-Qaradawi's book Halal and Haram in Islam, whose Urdu translation has been done by Muhammad Tahir Naqqash Sahib.
Mutual Relations Between Parents and Children
Children are the secret of the father, possessing his characteristics, the comfort of his eyes in life, and after death, the continuation of his existence. They are ongoing charity for him after death, a manifestation of his memory, the inheritors of his beauty, victory, and distinctive traits, and the piece of his heart and beloved soul.
This is why Allah has declared adultery forbidden and made marriage obligatory, so that lineage is preserved and the mixing of sperm does not occur. Also, so that children can recognize their father and the father can recognize his children. Marriage is the only prescribed way by which a woman becomes designated for a man, and infidelity towards the husband becomes forbidden. Any child born on the marital bed is called the child of the husband. No proof is required for this attribution (lineage), neither does the father need to declare nor the mother need to claim. Because according to the Prophetic saying:
الولد للفراش
“The child is for the one on whose bed he is born.”
Reference: Bukhari, Book of Hudud, Chapter on Adulterer’s Punishment, Hadith: 6818; Muslim, Book of Breastfeeding, Chapter on Child of the Bed, Hadith: 1457
Denying the lineage of one's son is not permissible
Therefore, it is not permissible for a husband to deny the lineage of a child born to his wife in his bed, that is, in the case of a proper marital relationship with him. Denying this would be severely harmful and disgraceful for both the wife and the child. Hence, taking such a step based merely on suspicion or rumor is not correct. However, if based on evidence and undeniable signs and proofs, he becomes certain that his wife has been unfaithful to him, then in such a case Islamic Shariah does not want to forcibly hand over the child for upbringing to a person who does not acknowledge the child as his own, nor does it want to forcibly make the child his heir.
In short, Islamic Shariah does not want to keep him in doubt and suspicion for life. The method it has proposed to resolve this confusion is called La'an. Therefore, whoever is certain or has a strong suspicion that his wife has defiled his bed with another’s seed and the child is from another’s seed (but cannot present any evidence for this), in such a case he should present his case before the judge’s court. The judge, after hearing the entire case between them, will perform La'an, the details of which are explained in the Holy Quran in Surah An-Nur:
وَالَّذِينَ يَرْمُونَ أَزْوَاجَهُمْ وَلَمْ يَكُن لَّهُمْ شُهَدَاءُ إِلَّا أَنفُسُهُمْ فَشَهَادَةُ أَحَدِهِمْ أَرْبَعُ شَهَادَاتٍ بِاللَّهِ ۙ إِنَّهُ لَمِنَ الصَّادِقِينَ 6 وَالْخَامِسَةُ أَنَّ لَعْنَتَ اللَّهِ عَلَيْهِ إِن كَانَ مِنَ الْكَاذِبِينَ 7 وَيَدْرَأُ عَنْهَا الْعَذَابَ أَن تَشْهَدَ أَرْبَعَ شَهَادَاتٍ بِاللَّهِ ۙ إِنَّهُ لَمِنَ الْكَاذِبِينَ 8 وَالْخَامِسَةَ أَنَّ غَضَبَ اللَّهِ عَلَيْهَا إِن كَانَ مِنَ الصَّادِقِينَ
“Those who accuse their wives and have no witnesses except themselves, the testimony of one of them shall be to swear four times by Allah that he is indeed telling the truth in his accusation, and the fifth time to invoke the curse of Allah upon himself if he is lying. And the woman shall respond with four oaths by Allah that he is lying, and the fifth that Allah’s wrath be upon her if the man is telling the truth in his accusation.”
Reference: (Surah An-Nur: 6 to 9)
After this, they will be permanently separated, and the child’s lineage will be attributed to the mother.
Adoption (Becoming a Foster Parent) is Forbidden in Islam
Just as it is not permissible for a father to deny his biological children, similarly, it is not permissible to consider a child who is not his biological offspring as his son. In the era of ignorance, Arabs, like other nations, used to attribute their lineage to whomever they wished through adoption (tabannī), and a man would adopt any boy he wanted as his adopted son. The rights and duties of the adopted son were the same as those of biological sons. This adoption was practiced even when the adopted son's father was known and his lineage was established.
When Islam arrived, this method of adoption was prevalent in Arab society. Accordingly, the Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) had adopted Sayyiduna Zaid bin Harithah (may Allah be pleased with him) during the era of ignorance.
Reference: Mustadrak al-Hakim: 3/213, Tabaqat Ibn Sa’d: 3/40, 27, Al-Isabah: 1/563
However, Islam considered this practice to be against reality, meaning that a stranger is falsely made a member of the family and lives in seclusion with the women of the household as if he were their mahram (unmarriageable kin), whereas he is not their mahram, and these women remain strangers to him.
When a person adopts someone and then makes him his heir, the real blood relatives, despite being rightful heirs, are deprived of inheritance. This causes hatred and jealousy in the hearts of the true relatives towards the adopted son. Inevitably, this results in discord and the deterioration of relationships. For these reasons, the Qur’an declared this ignorant system invalid and absolutely forbidden. Allah Almighty says:
وَمَا جَعَلَ أَدْعِيَاءَكُمْ أَبْنَاءَكُمْ ۚ ذَٰلِكُمْ قَوْلُكُم بِأَفْوَاهِكُمْ ۖ وَاللَّهُ يَقُولُ الْحَقَّ وَهُوَ يَهْدِي السَّبِيلَ 4 ادْعُوهُمْ لِآبَائِهِمْ هُوَ أَقْسَطُ عِندَ اللَّهِ ۚ فَإِن لَّمْ تَعْلَمُوا آبَاءَهُمْ فَإِخْوَانُكُمْ فِي الدِّينِ وَمَوَالِيكُمْ
“He has not made your adopted sons your real sons. This is a statement from your mouths, but Allah speaks the truth and guides to the (right) way. Call them by (the names of) their fathers; that is more just in the sight of Allah. But if you do not know their fathers, then they are your brothers in religion and your clients.”
Reference: (Surah Al-Ahzab: 4-5)
The Qur’anic statement that this is a statement from your mouths indicates that it is an empty claim with no external reality behind it.
In fact, words spoken do not change facts nor do they alter events and observations. Merely by saying so, a stranger does not become a relative, nor does an adopted son become a real son in any way. The words spoken cannot make the blood of the adopter flow in the veins of the adopted, nor can they create paternal affection in the heart of the adopter. Similarly, paternal feelings do not arise in the boy’s heart, nor can he acquire the physical, intellectual, and psychological characteristics of that family. Islam has completely erased all traces of this system, such as inheritance and the prohibition of marriage with the adopted son’s wife. Regarding inheritance, the Qur’an has given no importance to any relationship that is neither by blood, nor by marriage, nor by real kinship, and has not made such a person a sharer in inheritance.
وَأُولُو الْأَرْحَامِ بَعْضُهُمْ أَوْلَىٰ بِبَعْضٍ فِي كِتَابِ اللَّهِ ۗ إِنَّ اللَّهَ بِكُلِّ شَيْءٍ عَلِيمٌ
“And blood relatives are more entitled to inheritance in the law of Allah.”
Reference: (Surah Al-Anfal: 75)
Regarding marriage, the Qur’an has declared that the wives of real sons are forbidden, not the wives of adopted sons:
وَحَلَائِلُ أَبْنَائِكُمُ الَّذِينَ مِنْ أَصْلَابِكُمْ
“And (forbidden are) the wives of your sons who are from your loins (biological sons).”
Reference: (Surah An-Nisa: 23)
Therefore, it is permissible for the adopter to marry the widow or divorced wife of the adopted son because she is truly the wife of a stranger, and if the adopted son has divorced her, there is no harm in marrying her.
Refutation of Conversion through Practical Testimony
This was not easy for people because the system of adoption had deeply rooted itself in the lives of the Arabs. In view of this, Allah's wisdom required that its abolition be done not only by words but also by actions. For this important task, the noble person of the Prophet ﷺ was chosen so that all kinds of doubts and suspicions would be removed, and Muslims would feel no hesitation in marrying the divorced wives of their adopted sons. They would be assured that what Allah has declared lawful is lawful, and what He has declared unlawful is unlawful.
Sayyiduna Zaid bin Harithah رضي الله عنه, who was called Zaid bin Muhammad, married Zainab bint Jahsh رضي الله عنها, who was the cousin of the Prophet ﷺ. However, their relationship became strained, and Zaid began to complain about his wife to the Prophet ﷺ. The Prophet ﷺ was informed by revelation that Zaid would divorce her, and after that, the Prophet ﷺ would marry her. But sometimes human weakness prevailed, and the Prophet ﷺ did not express this openly to the people; instead, upon hearing Zaid's complaints, he would say, "Keep your wife with you and fear Allah." At this moment, the Quran was revealed, which completely ended this ancient system of ignorance:
فَلَمَّا قَضَىٰ زَيْدٌ مِّنْهَا وَطَرًا زَوَّجْنَاكَهَا لِكَيْ لَا يَكُونَ عَلَى الْمُؤْمِنِينَ حَرَجٌ فِي أَزْوَاجِ أَدْعِيَائِهِمْ إِذَا قَضَوْا مِنْهُنَّ وَطَرًا ۚ وَكَانَ أَمْرُ اللَّهِ مَفْعُولًا
"Then when Zaid had fulfilled his desire from her, We married her to you so that there would be no difficulty for the believers concerning the wives of their adopted sons when they have fulfilled their desire from them. And Allah's command must be fulfilled."
Reference: (Surah Al-Ahzab: 37) Bukhari Kitab al-Tafsir Surah Al-Ahzab Bab Qawluhu wa Takhafaa fi Nafsika H: 4878, 7420, Tirmidhi Kitab Tafsir al-Quran Bab Wa Min Surah Al-Ahzab H: 3207-3212
Tabanniyat meaning training
This is not the kind of tabanniyat (adoption) that Islam has declared forbidden, where a person adopts another's child, links him to his own lineage and family, and applies the rulings of a son to him, such as permitting mixing with the women of the house, making kinship relations unlawful for him, and making him entitled to inheritance, etc. But tabanniyat in the sense of upbringing is also a form that is different from the aforementioned type. People also consider this form as tabanniyat. In reality, this is not the tabanniyat that Islam has prohibited. It is when a person takes an orphan or a child without guardianship into his care and treats him compassionately, raising and nurturing him as if he were his own real son. He treats him exactly like his own son in feeding, clothing, educating, and so on. However, despite all these things, he does not attribute him to himself nor apply the rulings of a son to him. If the matter is handled within these limits, it will be a commendable act for which he will deserve great reward. The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said:
أنا وكافل اليتيم فى الجنة هكذا وأشار بالسبابة والوسطى وفرج بينهما
“I and the one who takes care of an orphan will be like this in Paradise.” He indicated this by joining his index and middle fingers and slightly separating them.
Reference: Bukhari, Book of Divorce, Chapter of Li'an, Hadith: 5304; Abu Dawood, Hadith: 5150
A lost child who is found by someone is considered an orphan and is primarily regarded as an Ibn al-Sabil (wayfarer/traveler), whose care Islam has instructed to be maintained.
Therefore, when a person has no children and wishes to benefit such a child financially, he may gift as much as he wants during his lifetime and may also bequeath up to one-third of his estate to him before his death.
Artificial Method of Confirming Pregnancy
Islam, by providing means to protect lineage and declaring adoption (tabannī) forbidden, aims to keep the family free from wrongful elements. In this context, the artificial method of conception is also declared forbidden when the pregnancy is established by the sperm of someone other than the husband. In fact, as the respected teacher Sheikh Shaltut said, this is a detestable crime and a matter of great sin. It is actually a form of adultery because both have the same essence and the same result. That is, placing the sperm of a stranger in the womb while there is no lawful marital relationship between the two, which is supported by both natural law and divine Shariah.
As far as the apparent form of this crime is concerned, if there were no legal defect, it would be considered under the ruling of adultery, which according to divine laws is a crime punishable by hadd (fixed punishment). There is no doubt that this form of establishing pregnancy is the worst crime and even greater than adoption because the child born through this method will combine both defects: one is the defect found in adoption, i.e., introducing an unrelated element into lineage, and the other is the defect of adultery, which neither any Shariah nor any law approves. This is a vile act that falls below the standards of humanity and reduces a person to the level of animals, who have no awareness of honorable social relations.
