Source: "Wālidayn aur Aulād ke Ḥuqūq" by Shaykh Jāwīd Iqbāl Sīālkotī
◈ Al-Nuʿmān ibn Bashīr رضي الله عنه narrated:
My father once took me to the Messenger of Allah ﷺ and said:
“I have gifted this son of mine a slave.”
The Prophet ﷺ asked:
“Have you gifted all your children the same as this?”
He replied: “No.”
The Prophet ﷺ said:
“Then take it back.”
Ṣaḥīḥ al-Bukhārī: 2586, Ṣaḥīḥ Muslim: 4177 – Kitāb al-Hibāt
In another narration:
Nuʿmān said:
“My father gave me a gift. My mother, ʿAmrah bint Rawāḥah, said: ‘I am not pleased until you make the Messenger of Allah ﷺ a witness to it.’
So my father went to the Prophet ﷺ and said:
‘I have given a gift to my son from ʿAmrah bint Rawāḥah, and she asked me to have you witness it.’
The Prophet ﷺ asked:
“Have you given all your children such a gift?”
He replied: “No.”
The Prophet ﷺ then said:
“Fear Allah and treat your children equally.”
Nuʿmān said:
“So my father went back and took the gift back.”
Another narration states that the Prophet ﷺ said:
“Would you not like all your children to be equally dutiful to you?”
He replied: “Yes, of course.”
The Prophet ﷺ said:
“Then do not show preference among them.”
And in yet another wording, the Prophet ﷺ said:
“I do not testify to injustice.”
These authentic narrations clearly establish that:
✔ Favoring one child over another in gifts or distribution during one’s lifetime is not permissible.
✔ Justice between sons and daughters is obligatory in gifts, land, or wealth, as long as it is given in one’s lifetime (ʿaṭiyyah).
✔ The Prophet ﷺ not only disapproved but refused to bear witness to such unjust actions.
✔ A parent must aim for fairness and equity, as it fosters love and unity among siblings.
Important Distinction:
﴿ يُوصِيكُمُ اللَّهُ فِي أَوْلَادِكُمْ ۖ لِلذَّكَرِ مِثْلُ حَظِّ الْأُنثَيَيْنِ ﴾
Sūrat al-Nisā’ (4): 11
“Allah instructs you concerning your children: for the male, a share equal to that of two females.”
① Parents must treat all their children equally in terms of gifts and distribution during their lifetime.
② The Prophet ﷺ rejected any unjust favoritism among children.
③ Sons and daughters are equal in voluntary gifts — difference only applies in inheritance, not in lifetime ʿaṭiyyah.
④ Equity fosters love, and favoritism leads to discord and resentment.
❖ Parents Must Be Just and Equal Among Their Children
◈ Al-Nuʿmān ibn Bashīr رضي الله عنه narrated:
My father once took me to the Messenger of Allah ﷺ and said:
“I have gifted this son of mine a slave.”
The Prophet ﷺ asked:
“Have you gifted all your children the same as this?”
He replied: “No.”
The Prophet ﷺ said:
“Then take it back.”
Ṣaḥīḥ al-Bukhārī: 2586, Ṣaḥīḥ Muslim: 4177 – Kitāb al-HibātIn another narration:
Nuʿmān said:
“My father gave me a gift. My mother, ʿAmrah bint Rawāḥah, said: ‘I am not pleased until you make the Messenger of Allah ﷺ a witness to it.’
So my father went to the Prophet ﷺ and said:
‘I have given a gift to my son from ʿAmrah bint Rawāḥah, and she asked me to have you witness it.’
The Prophet ﷺ asked:
“Have you given all your children such a gift?”
He replied: “No.”
The Prophet ﷺ then said:
“Fear Allah and treat your children equally.”
Nuʿmān said:
“So my father went back and took the gift back.”
Another narration states that the Prophet ﷺ said:
“Would you not like all your children to be equally dutiful to you?”
He replied: “Yes, of course.”
The Prophet ﷺ said:
“Then do not show preference among them.”
And in yet another wording, the Prophet ﷺ said:
“I do not testify to injustice.”
✦ Reflection:
These authentic narrations clearly establish that:
✔ Favoring one child over another in gifts or distribution during one’s lifetime is not permissible.
✔ Justice between sons and daughters is obligatory in gifts, land, or wealth, as long as it is given in one’s lifetime (ʿaṭiyyah).
✔ The Prophet ﷺ not only disapproved but refused to bear witness to such unjust actions.
✔ A parent must aim for fairness and equity, as it fosters love and unity among siblings.
Important Distinction:- In gifts given during life:
❖ Sons and daughters must be treated equally, as the Prophet ﷺ commanded fairness in such cases. - In inheritance after death:
❖ Distribution follows divine law (sharīʿah), where the male gets twice the share of the female, as stated in the Qur'an:
﴿ يُوصِيكُمُ اللَّهُ فِي أَوْلَادِكُمْ ۖ لِلذَّكَرِ مِثْلُ حَظِّ الْأُنثَيَيْنِ ﴾
Sūrat al-Nisā’ (4): 11“Allah instructs you concerning your children: for the male, a share equal to that of two females.”
✔ Summary:
① Parents must treat all their children equally in terms of gifts and distribution during their lifetime.
② The Prophet ﷺ rejected any unjust favoritism among children.
③ Sons and daughters are equal in voluntary gifts — difference only applies in inheritance, not in lifetime ʿaṭiyyah.
④ Equity fosters love, and favoritism leads to discord and resentment.
