❀ Shar‘i Ruling on Seeking Divorce or Khul‘ from an Abusive Husband ❀
Source:
This article is derived from the book “500 Questions and Answers for Women” based on the fatwas of the scholars of the Haramain, translated by Hafiz Abdullah Saleem.
What is the Shar‘i ruling on demanding divorce when living with the husband becomes unbearable due to the following reasons?
My husband is ignorant and unaware of my rights. He frequently insults me and my parents, calling me names like Jew, Christian, or Rāfiḍī. I have been patient with his immoral conduct for the sake of our children. However, when I developed joint pain, I could no longer bear it and lost my strength to remain silent. I now feel such strong hatred towards him that I cannot even tolerate speaking to him.
When I demanded a divorce under these conditions, he refused. For the past six years, I have been living in his house with my children like a divorced stranger, yet he continues to reject my request for divorce.
Please guide me with a correct and righteous answer.
If your husband's behavior is truly as you described, then there is no sin in demanding a divorce under such circumstances.
✔ In fact, if necessary, seeking khulʿ (divorce through compensation) is also permissible in order to free yourself from his abuse.
Given his verbal abuse, excesses, and poor treatment, you may offer him a financial settlement in return for divorce and separate yourself from him.
If, for the sake of your children and to maintain financial stability, you are able to endure his treatment and continue advising him in a good manner, while praying for his guidance,
then we hope that Allah will reward you abundantly and grant you a good end.
We too ask Allah Almighty to guide him and grant him steadfastness.
However, if your husband:
then he is considered a disbeliever (kāfir), and it is impermissible for you to remain under his authority or continue living with him.
There is unanimous consensus among the scholars that mocking Islam or speaking against it is clear disbelief (kufr), deviation, and apostasy from Islam.
Allah says:
﴿قُلْ أَبِاللَّـهِ وَآيَاتِهِ وَرَسُولِهِ كُنتُمْ تَسْتَهْزِئُونَ ٭ لَا تَعْتَذِرُوا قَدْ كَفَرْتُم بَعْدَ إِيمَانِكُمْ﴾
[Surah At-Tawbah: 65–66]
"Say: Was it Allah, His signs, and His Messenger that you were mocking? Make no excuse—you have disbelieved after your belief."
According to the stronger scholarly opinion, abandoning Salah is major disbelief (kufr akbar), even if the person does not deny its obligation.
The Prophet ﷺ said:
"بين الرجل وبين الكفر والشرك ترك الصلاة"
[Ṣaḥīḥ Muslim – Kitāb al-Īmān, Bāb 35]
“Between a man and disbelief and polytheism is the abandonment of prayer.”
He also said:
"العهد الذي بيننا وبينهم الصلاة، فمن تركها فقد كفر"
[Reported in: Sunan al-Tirmidhī 2623, Sunan al-Nasā’ī, Sunan Ibn Mājah 1079, Musnad Aḥmad 5/346, al-Mustadrak 1/7, Sunan al-Dārimī, al-Sunan al-Kubrā by al-Bayhaqī 3/366, Muṣannaf Ibn Abī Shaybah 11/34, Ṣaḥīḥ Ibn Ḥibbān 1454]
“The covenant between us and them is prayer; whoever abandons it has committed disbelief.”
Many other evidences from the Qur’an and Sunnah support this ruling.
Allah is the source of help.
(By: Former Grand Mufti of Saudi Arabia, Shaykh Ibn Bāz رحمه الله)
Source:
This article is derived from the book “500 Questions and Answers for Women” based on the fatwas of the scholars of the Haramain, translated by Hafiz Abdullah Saleem.
❖ Question:
What is the Shar‘i ruling on demanding divorce when living with the husband becomes unbearable due to the following reasons?
My husband is ignorant and unaware of my rights. He frequently insults me and my parents, calling me names like Jew, Christian, or Rāfiḍī. I have been patient with his immoral conduct for the sake of our children. However, when I developed joint pain, I could no longer bear it and lost my strength to remain silent. I now feel such strong hatred towards him that I cannot even tolerate speaking to him.
When I demanded a divorce under these conditions, he refused. For the past six years, I have been living in his house with my children like a divorced stranger, yet he continues to reject my request for divorce.
Please guide me with a correct and righteous answer.
❖ Answer:
If your husband's behavior is truly as you described, then there is no sin in demanding a divorce under such circumstances.
✔ In fact, if necessary, seeking khulʿ (divorce through compensation) is also permissible in order to free yourself from his abuse.
Given his verbal abuse, excesses, and poor treatment, you may offer him a financial settlement in return for divorce and separate yourself from him.
❖ If You Choose Patience:
If, for the sake of your children and to maintain financial stability, you are able to endure his treatment and continue advising him in a good manner, while praying for his guidance,
then we hope that Allah will reward you abundantly and grant you a good end.
We too ask Allah Almighty to guide him and grant him steadfastness.
❖ If He Does Not Pray or Mocks the Religion:
However, if your husband:- Does not perform Salah (prayer), or
- Mocks the religion, or
- Blasphemes against Islam,
then he is considered a disbeliever (kāfir), and it is impermissible for you to remain under his authority or continue living with him.
There is unanimous consensus among the scholars that mocking Islam or speaking against it is clear disbelief (kufr), deviation, and apostasy from Islam.
Allah says:
﴿قُلْ أَبِاللَّـهِ وَآيَاتِهِ وَرَسُولِهِ كُنتُمْ تَسْتَهْزِئُونَ ٭ لَا تَعْتَذِرُوا قَدْ كَفَرْتُم بَعْدَ إِيمَانِكُمْ﴾
[Surah At-Tawbah: 65–66]
"Say: Was it Allah, His signs, and His Messenger that you were mocking? Make no excuse—you have disbelieved after your belief."
According to the stronger scholarly opinion, abandoning Salah is major disbelief (kufr akbar), even if the person does not deny its obligation.
The Prophet ﷺ said:
"بين الرجل وبين الكفر والشرك ترك الصلاة"
[Ṣaḥīḥ Muslim – Kitāb al-Īmān, Bāb 35]
“Between a man and disbelief and polytheism is the abandonment of prayer.”
He also said:
"العهد الذي بيننا وبينهم الصلاة، فمن تركها فقد كفر"
[Reported in: Sunan al-Tirmidhī 2623, Sunan al-Nasā’ī, Sunan Ibn Mājah 1079, Musnad Aḥmad 5/346, al-Mustadrak 1/7, Sunan al-Dārimī, al-Sunan al-Kubrā by al-Bayhaqī 3/366, Muṣannaf Ibn Abī Shaybah 11/34, Ṣaḥīḥ Ibn Ḥibbān 1454]
“The covenant between us and them is prayer; whoever abandons it has committed disbelief.”
Many other evidences from the Qur’an and Sunnah support this ruling.
Allah is the source of help.
(By: Former Grand Mufti of Saudi Arabia, Shaykh Ibn Bāz رحمه الله)
