Is Istikhārah Sunnah for Engagements and Marriage Proposals?
Source: Fatāwā Amunpūrī by Shaykh Ghulām Mustafa Zaheer Amunpūrī
Is performing Istikhārah Sunnah when it comes to engagements and marriage proposals?
Yes — the Messenger of Allah ﷺ prescribed a specific duʿā of Istikhārah for marriage proposals. This clearly establishes that Istikhārah is Sunnah in such matters.
“When one of you intends to send a proposal (for marriage), let him keep it discreet, perform ablution, offer prayer, praise Allah, and then recite the following duʿā:”
اللَّهُمَّ إِنَّكَ تَقْدِرُ وَلَا أَقْدِرُ، وَتَعْلَمُ وَلَا أَعْلَمُ، وَأَنْتَ عَلَّامُ الْغُيُوبِ، فَإِنْ رَأَيْتَ لِي فُلَانَةَ (تُسَمِّيهَا بِاسْمِهَا) خَيْرًا لِي فِي دِينِي وَدُنْيَايَ وَآخِرَتِي فَاقْدِرْهَا لِي، وَإِنْ كَانَ غَيْرُهَا خَيْرًا لِي مِنْهَا فِي دِينِي وَدُنْيَايَ وَآخِرَتِي فَاقْضِ لِي بِهَا.
“O Allah! You have power and I do not. You know and I do not. You are the Knower of the unseen. If You know that [mention the name of the woman] is better for me in my religion, worldly life, and Hereafter, then decree her for me. But if another woman is better for me in my religion, worldly life, and Hereafter, then decree that for me instead.”
(Al-Muʿjam al-Kabīr by Ṭabarānī 4/133; al-Sunan al-Kubrā by al-Bayhaqī 7/147 – Chain is Ṣaḥīḥ)
This ḥadīth has been graded ṣaḥīḥ by Imām Ibn Khuzaymah (1220), Ibn Ḥibbān (4040), al-Ḥākim (1/314), and approved by Ḥāfiẓ al-Dhahabī.
Imām al-Ḥākim also affirmed that all the narrators are trustworthy.
When the Prophet ﷺ sent a proposal to Sayyidah Zaynab رضي الله عنها, she responded:
ما أنا بصانعة شيئًا حتى أوامر ربي، فقامت إلى مسجدها
“I will not do anything until I consult my Lord.” Then she stood up and went to her prayer place.
(Ṣaḥīḥ Muslim: 1428)
This narration proves that even the noble companions performed Istikhārah for marriage proposals and understood it as an essential part of decision-making.
✔ Istikhārah is a prescribed Sunnah for engagements and marriage proposals.
✔ A special duʿā was taught by the Prophet ﷺ for such circumstances.
✔ It reflects a believer’s complete reliance on Allah’s knowledge and decree.
✔ Examples from the lives of the Prophet ﷺ and his noble companions further support its practice.
Source: Fatāwā Amunpūrī by Shaykh Ghulām Mustafa Zaheer Amunpūrī
❖ Question:
Is performing Istikhārah Sunnah when it comes to engagements and marriage proposals?
✿ Answer:
Yes — the Messenger of Allah ﷺ prescribed a specific duʿā of Istikhārah for marriage proposals. This clearly establishes that Istikhārah is Sunnah in such matters.
❀ Sayyidunā Abū Ayyūb al-Anṣārī رضي الله عنه narrated:
“When one of you intends to send a proposal (for marriage), let him keep it discreet, perform ablution, offer prayer, praise Allah, and then recite the following duʿā:”
❀ Arabic Duʿā for Marriage Istikhārah:
اللَّهُمَّ إِنَّكَ تَقْدِرُ وَلَا أَقْدِرُ، وَتَعْلَمُ وَلَا أَعْلَمُ، وَأَنْتَ عَلَّامُ الْغُيُوبِ، فَإِنْ رَأَيْتَ لِي فُلَانَةَ (تُسَمِّيهَا بِاسْمِهَا) خَيْرًا لِي فِي دِينِي وَدُنْيَايَ وَآخِرَتِي فَاقْدِرْهَا لِي، وَإِنْ كَانَ غَيْرُهَا خَيْرًا لِي مِنْهَا فِي دِينِي وَدُنْيَايَ وَآخِرَتِي فَاقْضِ لِي بِهَا.
❀ Translation of the Duʿā:
“O Allah! You have power and I do not. You know and I do not. You are the Knower of the unseen. If You know that [mention the name of the woman] is better for me in my religion, worldly life, and Hereafter, then decree her for me. But if another woman is better for me in my religion, worldly life, and Hereafter, then decree that for me instead.”
(Al-Muʿjam al-Kabīr by Ṭabarānī 4/133; al-Sunan al-Kubrā by al-Bayhaqī 7/147 – Chain is Ṣaḥīḥ) This ḥadīth has been graded ṣaḥīḥ by Imām Ibn Khuzaymah (1220), Ibn Ḥibbān (4040), al-Ḥākim (1/314), and approved by Ḥāfiẓ al-Dhahabī. Imām al-Ḥākim also affirmed that all the narrators are trustworthy.❀ Example from the Sunnah:
When the Prophet ﷺ sent a proposal to Sayyidah Zaynab رضي الله عنها, she responded:
ما أنا بصانعة شيئًا حتى أوامر ربي، فقامت إلى مسجدها
“I will not do anything until I consult my Lord.” Then she stood up and went to her prayer place.
(Ṣaḥīḥ Muslim: 1428)This narration proves that even the noble companions performed Istikhārah for marriage proposals and understood it as an essential part of decision-making.
Conclusion:
✔ Istikhārah is a prescribed Sunnah for engagements and marriage proposals.
✔ A special duʿā was taught by the Prophet ﷺ for such circumstances.
✔ It reflects a believer’s complete reliance on Allah’s knowledge and decree.
✔ Examples from the lives of the Prophet ﷺ and his noble companions further support its practice.
