Excerpt: Fatawa Aman Puri by Sheikh Ghulam Mustafa Zaheer Aman Puri
Question:
If a wife hates her husband, what is the ruling?
Answer:
It is a sin to hate one's wife without reason. However, if a wife does not naturally like her husband, she should demand a divorce from him. If the husband does not grant the divorce, she can annul the marriage through Khula, because it is far better for them to separate than to live together in hatred; in this lies their worldly and hereafter welfare. Otherwise, while remaining a wife, if she does not fulfill her duties properly, she will be accountable in the hereafter.
❀ Sayyidina Abdullah bin Abbas (may Allah be pleased with him) narrates:
The wife of Thabit bin Qais (may Allah be pleased with him) came to the Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) and said: "I do not find any fault in Thabit's religion or character, but I fear disbelief (disobedience to the husband) in Islam." The Prophet (peace be upon him) asked: "Will you return his garden?" She said: "Yes!" So the Prophet (peace be upon him) ordered: "Return the garden to him." The Prophet (peace be upon him) separated them.
Reference: (Sahih al-Bukhari: 5276)
❀ Sayyidina Muadh bin Jabal (may Allah be pleased with him) narrates that the Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) said:
لا تؤذي امرأة زوجها فى الدنيا إلا قالت زوجته من الحور العين لا تؤذيه قاتلك الله فإنما هو عندك دخيل يوشك أن يفارقك إلينا
"When a worldly wife causes her husband distress, his houri wife says: 'May Allah destroy you, do not trouble him, he is a guest with you, very soon he will leave you and come to us.'"
Reference: (Musnad Ahmad: 242/5, Sunan al-Tirmidhi: 1174, Sunan Ibn Majah: 2014, its chain is Hasan)
Imam Tirmidhi (may Allah have mercy on him) classified this hadith as Hasan Gharib. Hafiz Dhahabi (may Allah have mercy on him) stated that its chain is authentic and connected.
Reference: (Siyar A'lam al-Nubala: 47/4)
Sayyidina Abu Musa al-Ash'ari (may Allah be pleased with him) narrates that the Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) said:
"Three people's supplications are not accepted; the one whose wife is ill-mannered and rude, and he does not divorce her. The one who lends money but does not have witnesses. The one who entrusts his wealth (for trade) to an unwise person, whereas Allah Almighty's command is: ﴿وَلَا تُؤْتُوا السُّفَهَاءَ أَمْوَالَكُمْ﴾
Reference: (An-Nisa: 5)
Do not entrust your wealth to unwise people."
Reference: (Al-Mustadrak al-Hakim: 331/2, Sunan al-Kubra al-Bayhaqi: 146/10, its chain is authentic)
Imam Hakim (may Allah have mercy on him) declared it authentic according to the conditions of Bukhari and Muslim, and Hafiz Dhahabi (may Allah have mercy on him) agreed.
If a person does not divorce his ill-mannered wife, his supplication is not accepted. This means that when the wife troubles him, he prays to Allah to remove this distress, and his supplication is not accepted because Allah has granted him the option to divorce such an ill-mannered wife, but he does not do so. If such a person prays to Allah regarding the troubles caused by his wife, his supplication is rejected. This does not refer to supplication in general.
