❖ Kissing and Displaying Affection Before Family: A Sharīʿah-Based Ruling
Source: Fatāwā Arkān-e-Islām
◈ Introduction
Al-ḥamdu lillāh, waṣ-ṣalātu was-salāmu ʿalā Rasūlillāh, Ammā baʿd!
Islam treats the relationship between husband and wife with dignity, modesty, and privacy. It lays down clear etiquettes for their conduct. One important question arises: Is it permissible for a man to kiss or caress his wife in front of children or other family members? This article answers the question in the light of Qur’an and Sunnah.
① Spouses as a Garment for Each Other
Allah ﷻ says:
﴿هُنَّ لِبَاسٌۭ لَّكُمْ وَأَنتُمْ لِبَاسٌۭ لَّهُنَّ﴾
(Al-Baqarah: 187)
“They are a garment for you, and you are a garment for them.”
✔ This verse illustrates that:
◈ The relationship between spouses is intimate, exclusive, and modest.
◈ Just as garments conceal and protect, so should marital affection be private and shielded from public display.
◈ Expressing intimacy in front of others contradicts the spirit of modesty this verse implies.
② Kissing and Affection: Permissible But Private
✔ Kissing and other forms of affection between husband and wife are:
◈ Sharīʿah-permissible and natural expressions of love.
◈ However, they are related to modesty (ḥayā’), and therefore, should be kept private.
◈ Engaging in such acts openly in front of children or other household members can:
➤ Encourage immodesty and lower standards of decency.
➤ Negatively influence the character, psychology, and spirituality of observers, particularly young children.
➤ Lead to normalization of shamelessness, which is against Islamic ethics.
③ Qur’anic Warning Against the Spread of Immorality
Allah ﷻ warns:
﴿إِنَّ ٱلَّذِينَ يُحِبُّونَ أَن تَشِيعَ ٱلْفَـٰحِشَةُ فِى ٱلَّذِينَ ءَامَنُوا۟ لَهُمْ عَذَابٌ أَلِيمٌۭ فِى ٱلدُّنْيَا وَٱلْـَٔاخِرَةِ ۚ وَٱللَّهُ يَعْلَمُ وَأَنتُمْ لَا تَعْلَمُونَ﴾
(Al-Nūr: 19)
“Indeed, those who love to spread immorality among the believers will have a painful punishment in this world and the Hereafter. And Allah knows, while you do not know.”
✔ From this verse, scholars infer:
◈ Intentionally exposing or normalizing acts of physical intimacy can be part of spreading indecency.
◈ Such behavior may bring about divine punishment and moral corruption in society.
◈ Therefore, even though the act itself may be ḥalāl, its public exhibition is ḥarām and severely discouraged.
✔ Summary of Rulings
➊ Kissing and intimacy between spouses is ḥalāl within marriage.
➋ Displaying such acts in front of children or family members is ḥarām or at least strongly condemned both morally and Islamically.
➌ Spouses must ensure their marital affection remains private, to preserve ḥayā’, protect the family environment, and uphold Islamic values.
➍ Such behavior, if done publicly, may fall under the spread of indecency, warned against in Sūrat al-Nūr, verse 19.
Qur’anic References:◈ Sūrat al-Baqarah: 187
◈ Sūrat al-Nūr: 19
وَبِاللّٰهِ التَّوْفِيق
