Surah Al-Baqara (2) — Ayah 234

234. And those among you who die and leave behind wives, such wives shall wait for four months and ten days. When they have completed their waiting period [326], there is no blame upon you for what they do with themselves in a fair manner [327]. And Allah is fully aware of what you do.

The Duration and Wisdom of Mourning:

In general circumstances, the waiting period (‘iddah) for a widow is four months and ten days. However, if she is pregnant, her ‘iddah lasts until childbirth [4: 65], and this is also the duration of mourning for a widow. Thus, the Prophet ﷺ said: “It is not permissible for any woman who believes in Allah and the Last Day to mourn for any deceased person for more than three days, except for her husband, for whom she must mourn for four months and ten days.” [بخاري، كتاب الجنائز، باب إحداد المرأة على غير زوجها] And Hazrat Umm ‘Atiyyah ؓ says: “We were forbidden from mourning for any deceased person for more than three days, except for the husband, for whom we were commanded to mourn for four months and ten days. And the command was that during these days, we should neither apply kohl nor perfume, nor wear dyed clothes, except those made from colored thread. However, it was permitted that if any of us became pure from menstruation and performed ghusl, she could apply kust al-azfar (a type of perfume). We were also forbidden from accompanying funeral processions.” [بخاري، كتاب الحيض، باب الطيب للمرأة عند غسلها من المحيض]

And Hazrat Zainab bint Abi Salamah ؓ says: I heard my mother, Umm Salamah ؓ, say that a woman came to the Messenger of Allah ﷺ and said: “My daughter’s husband has died and her eyes are hurting. Can we apply kohl to her?” The Prophet ﷺ replied, “No.” The woman asked the same question a second time, and again the Prophet ﷺ said, “No.” When she asked a third time, the Prophet ﷺ still replied in the negative. Then he said: “In Islam, the period of ‘iddah and mourning is only four months and ten days, whereas in the time of ignorance (Jahiliyyah), this waiting period was a full year. After the year had passed, the woman would throw a camel’s dung.” Humayd (the narrator) asked Zainab ؓ, “What is the story of throwing the camel’s dung?” Zainab ؓ replied: “In the time of ignorance, it was customary that when a woman’s husband died, she would sit in a narrow and dark hut, wear the worst clothes, apply no perfume, and do no adornment or beautification. She would spend the entire year in this state. After the year had passed, they would bring her an animal, such as a donkey, goat, or bird, with which she would rub her private part, and sometimes the animal would die. After that, she would be given a camel’s dung, which she would throw in front of herself (this was considered a sign that her ‘iddah was complete), and only then could she apply perfume, etc.” [بخاري، كتاب الطلاق باب تحد المتوفي عنها زوجها اربعه أشهر و عشرا] As for the matter of where a woman should spend this waiting or mourning period, the preferred opinion is that she should spend it in her husband’s house, and she is permitted to travel only so much that she can return to her place by night. Some scholars also hold the view that a widow may spend her ‘iddah wherever she wishes and is not restricted from traveling.

The Wisdom of ‘Iddah:

This ‘iddah has been prescribed by Allah Almighty so that it may be known whether the woman is pregnant from her deceased husband. If she is pregnant, then her ‘iddah will last until childbirth, so that there is no confusion in lineage. After four months and ten days, she is free regarding her marriage, and within this period it can be ascertained with certainty whether she is pregnant from the deceased husband or not.

[327] That is, it is permissible for them to discuss marriage, adorn themselves, apply perfume, move from the place of ‘iddah to another place, get married, and do whatever they consider better and appropriate for themselves, and there is no sin upon you in this.