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سنن دارمي
Darimi
من كتاب النكاحFrom the Book of Marriage
باب النَّهْيِ عَنْ ضَرْبِ النِّسَاءِ:Chapter: Prohibition of Beating Women
Hadith 2257
اُردوEn
أَخْبَرَنَا جَعْفَرُ بْنُ عَوْنٍ، أَخْبَرَنَا هِشَامُ بْنُ عُرْوَةَ، عَنْ أَبِيهِ، عَنْ عَبْدِ اللَّهِ بْنِ زَمَعَةَ، قَالَ: خَطَبَ رَسُولُ اللَّهِ صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ النَّاسَ يَوْمًا فَوَعَظَهُمْ فِي النِّسَاءِ، فَقَالَ: "مَا بَالُ الرَّجُلِ يَجْلِدُ امْرَأَتَهُ جَلْدَ الْعَبْدِ، وَلَعَلَّهُ يُضَاجِعُهَا فِي آخِرِ يَوْمِهِ ؟ !".
Sayyiduna Abdullah bin Zam’ah (may Allah be pleased with him) said: One day, the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him) delivered a sermon and advised the people regarding women. He (peace be upon him) said: "What is the matter with a man that he beats his wife like a slave, yet at the end of the same day he goes to sleep with her (or will do so)?"
Brief Explanation
(Commentary on Hadiths 2254 to 2257)
A man first beats and then shows affection—this can create hatred within the marital relationship.
It is better, as much as possible, not to raise a hand against the woman at all, and if her fault is very great, then first express displeasure verbally, scold her, stop letting her sleep beside you, or turn your face away and sleep. If even then she does not come to the right path, then lightly admonish or strike her, but do not strike her on the face.
How loving and merciful was our Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, that he never struck any servant, never troubled his wife, nor struck any other person as a form of reprimand. Indeed, he was merciful to the entire Ummah, but for his own family, wives, and children, he was especially good, merciful, generous, compassionate, and kind.
He sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said: “The best among you is the one who is best to his family, and I am the best among you to my family.”
There is nothing wrong in this; rather, this is the beautiful example (uswah hasanah) of the Messenger of Allah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam.
It is unfortunate that today, if someone does good and treats his wife kindly, some people taunt him as being subservient to his wife (may Allah guide us).
In these blessed hadiths, in both word and deed, the Noble Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam taught good conduct towards wives and, as much as possible, not to beat them.
In a most eloquent and articulate manner, he said: A man beats his wife during the day and embraces her at night—he instilled shame for this behavior. Then, if there is a need to strike, do so, but not like one strikes a donkey, horse, or slave, and do not humiliate or disgrace her. Avoid excess and deficiency.
And Allah knows best.
A man first beats and then shows affection—this can create hatred within the marital relationship.
It is better, as much as possible, not to raise a hand against the woman at all, and if her fault is very great, then first express displeasure verbally, scold her, stop letting her sleep beside you, or turn your face away and sleep. If even then she does not come to the right path, then lightly admonish or strike her, but do not strike her on the face.
How loving and merciful was our Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, that he never struck any servant, never troubled his wife, nor struck any other person as a form of reprimand. Indeed, he was merciful to the entire Ummah, but for his own family, wives, and children, he was especially good, merciful, generous, compassionate, and kind.
He sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said: “The best among you is the one who is best to his family, and I am the best among you to my family.”
There is nothing wrong in this; rather, this is the beautiful example (uswah hasanah) of the Messenger of Allah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam.
It is unfortunate that today, if someone does good and treats his wife kindly, some people taunt him as being subservient to his wife (may Allah guide us).
In these blessed hadiths, in both word and deed, the Noble Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam taught good conduct towards wives and, as much as possible, not to beat them.
In a most eloquent and articulate manner, he said: A man beats his wife during the day and embraces her at night—he instilled shame for this behavior. Then, if there is a need to strike, do so, but not like one strikes a donkey, horse, or slave, and do not humiliate or disgrace her. Avoid excess and deficiency.
And Allah knows best.
