Bukhari

Hadith Commentary:
The narrator of the hadith is uncertain whether this is the same daughter of Abu Sabrah who was in the house of Mu'adh (radi Allahu anhu), or whether another daughter is being mentioned here, and the wife of Mu'adh (radi Allahu anhu) who was among those who fulfilled the pledge was not the daughter of Abu Sabrah.
Mu'adh's wife was Umm Amr bint Khallad.
The Messenger of Allah (sallallahu alayhi wa sallam) would, from time to time, take the pledge (bay'ah) from Muslim men and women for steadfastness upon Islam.
On such an occasion, the Prophet (sallallahu alayhi wa sallam) specifically took the pledge from women not to wail (perform niyahah) over the dead.
The technical meaning of bay'ah is to make a declaration (of commitment).
It is a kind of oath.
There are many types of bay'ah,
the detailed explanation of which will come at its appropriate place.
This hadith also shows that no matter how great a person may be, he is still a collection of weaknesses.
The status of the female Companions (sahabiyyat) is established, yet even among them, many women could not remain firm upon this pledge, as has been mentioned.

Hadith Commentary:
(1)
In these ahadith, there is a very severe warning and rebuke regarding wailing (nohah khwani), because in the first hadith there is an order to put soil in the mouths of women who wail.
This could literally mean putting soil in their mouths, as mentioned in hadith (1304), where it is stated about Umar radi Allahu anhu that he would throw stones at women who wailed and would put soil in their mouths.
It is also possible that this means to declare such women as deprived, because regarding a failed person it is said that he has nothing in his hand except soil.

(2)
Wailing or beating the chest at the time of calamity is an extremely grave sin.
The seriousness of this can be gauged from the fact that the Messenger of Allah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam would take a pledge (bay‘ah) from the women of Islam for this prohibitive command, as mentioned in the second hadith, that the Messenger of Allah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam took a pledge from women not to perform the ignorant wailing and mourning, but except for five women, none fulfilled this pledge.
This refers only to those women who pledged allegiance at that time with Umm ‘Atiyyah radi Allahu anha.
Their names are: Umm Sulaym, Umm al-‘Ala’, Umm Kulthum, Umm ‘Amr, and Hind bint Sahal.
It is possible that Umm ‘Atiyyah radi Allahu anha herself is included among them, because in some narrations it is mentioned that, “Other than me and Umm Sulaym, none fulfilled this pledge.”
But in one narration, she herself states that on the day of Harrah, she wailed over the martyrdom of the noble Companions radi Allahu anhum, and therefore did not count herself among them.
It is possible that up until the incident of Harrah she considered herself included, and after that she was not able to uphold it.
(Fath al-Bari: 3/226)
Wallahu a‘lam.

Hadith Commentary: In another narration, it is mentioned that he (the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam) granted her permission. This was a specific ruling given to Umm ‘Atiyyah radi Allahu anha; otherwise, lamentation (nawh) is generally forbidden, and there are authentic ahadith regarding its prohibition. Some of the Malikis have stated that lamentation is forbidden, rather, this is an odd and rejected view.

Qastallani said that initially lamentation was permissible, then it became disliked (makruh tanzihi), and then it became forbidden. It is possible that at the time of Umm ‘Atiyyah’s radi Allahu anha pledge, it was makruh tanzihi, and for this reason, the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam granted her permission. After that, it became forbidden.

Hafiz said that lamentation is absolutely forbidden, and this is the view of all the scholars. Therefore, from the verse ﴿وَلَا يَعْصِينَكَ فِي مَعْرُوفٍ﴾, the meaning will be that they should not lament, or that non-mahram men should not do so, or that they should not disobey their husbands. If the meaning is that they should not disobey you in good matters, then this ruling would be general for both men and women, as is evident from the hadith ahead, where the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam took the pledge from the Ansar on these same conditions during the night of ‘Aqabah, and every man and woman among the Ansar gladly pledged on these conditions and proved by their actions that they would not turn away from these conditions nor break their pledge. May Allah the Exalted grant the Ansar the best of rewards for their loyalty.

Ameen.

Hadith Commentary:
➊
It is not permissible to hold a woman's hand or shake hands with her when taking her pledge of allegiance (bay‘ah); however, when taking the pledge from men, it is correct to place hand upon hand. In a previous hadith, it was clarified that the Messenger of Allah (sallallahu alayhi wa sallam) never touched the hand of any woman during the pledge of allegiance. He would take their pledge only verbally.
(Sahih al-Bukhari, al-Tafsir, Hadith: 4891)

➋
Although a woman's weeping and wailing over the deceased and mentioning his virtues is called "niyahah" (wailing), in Islam, two more things are also included in niyahah. One is gathering in a particular house or mosque for condolence (ta‘ziyah). The second is that the family of the deceased prepares food for those coming to offer condolences. Thus, Jarir ibn ‘Abdullah al-Bajali (radi Allahu anhu) said: We used to count gathering at the house of the family of the deceased and preparing food there after burial as part of niyahah.
(Musnad Ahmad: 204/2)

➌
The Messenger of Allah (sallallahu alayhi wa sallam) declared wailing (niyahah) as a remnant of the days of ignorance (jahiliyyah) and said:
"If a wailing woman dies before repenting, on the Day of Resurrection she will be made to wear a garment of pitch and a cloak of scabs."
(Sahih Muslim, al-Jana'iz, Hadith: 2160 (934))

Hadith Commentary:
In the narration, what is meant by "withdrawing the hand" is that she hesitated in accepting the conditions of the pledge (bay‘ah).

The five women who remained steadfast upon the pledge are these:
Umm Sulaym, Umm al-‘Ala’, the daughter of Abi Sabrah, the wife of Mu‘adh, and another woman. All of them refrained from wailing (nawh).

There is doubt on the part of the narrator as to whether the daughter of Abu Sabrah was the wife of Mu‘adh, or whether the wife of Mu‘adh was someone else besides her.

Hafiz said: The correct view is that it is with the conjunction "waaw" (and), because the wife of Mu‘adh was Umm ‘Umar radi Allahu anha bint Khallad.

In the narration of al-Nasa’i, it is stated clearly: The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said, "Go and make up for it," so she went, then returned and pledged allegiance to him. Perhaps this wailing was not of the type that is categorically forbidden, or this permission was specifically for this woman, as some of the Malikis have said that wailing (nawh) is not forbidden, but the actions of the Age of Ignorance (jahiliyyah) within wailing are forbidden, such as tearing clothes, scratching the face or body, or scattering dust.

Some have said that until that time, wailing had not yet been forbidden.

Qastallani said: The correct view is that initially wailing was permissible, then it became disliked (makruh tanzihi), then after that, it became strictly forbidden (makruh tahrimi).

(Wahidi)

Hadith Commentary:
➊
In one narration, it is stated that the Messenger of Allah (sallallahu alayhi wa sallam) never touched the hand of any unrelated and non-mahram woman, but when he would take the pledge of allegiance (bay‘ah) and she would commit to that pledge, he would say:
“Go, I have accepted your pledge of allegiance.”
(Sahih Muslim, Al-Imarah, Hadith: 4835(1866))
In another narration, the Messenger of Allah (sallallahu alayhi wa sallam) said:
“I do not shake hands with women.”
(Sunan Nasai, Al-Bay‘ah, Hadith: 4186)
The full translation of the verse mentioned in the hadith is as follows:
“O Prophet! When believing women come to you to give you the pledge that they will not associate anything with Allah, nor will they steal, nor commit adultery, nor kill their children, nor bring forth a slander they have invented between their hands and feet, nor disobey you in what is right, then accept their pledge and ask Allah’s forgiveness for them.
Indeed, Allah is Most Forgiving, Most Merciful.”
(Al-Mumtahanah: 12/60)

➋
It is mentioned in the hadith that when Fatimah bint ‘Uqbah (radi Allahu anha) came to the Messenger of Allah (sallallahu alayhi wa sallam) to pledge allegiance, he (sallallahu alayhi wa sallam) took from her the pledge that she would not commit fornication.
Out of modesty, she placed her hand on her head.
‘Aishah (radi Allahu anha) said:
“O servant of Allah! Give the pledge; by Allah, we pledged allegiance on this very matter.”
She said:
“Then I also pledge allegiance.”
(Musnad Ahmad: 151/6)

Hadith Commentary: Benefits and Issues: Abu Sabrah's daughter is a different woman. This is because the name of the wife of Mu'adh radi Allahu anhu is Umm Amr bint Khallad radi Allahu anha. And the fifth woman is Umm Atiyyah radi Allahu anha herself. Among the women who pledged allegiance with Umm Atiyyah radi Allahu anha, these five fulfilled the pledge completely. And besides them, countless other Muslim women also abandoned wailing. However, there were some women among them who showed some weakness.

Benefits and Issues:
It is clearly understood from this that wailing and lamenting over the deceased, screaming, making a commotion, tearing one's collar, and scratching the face, etc., are prohibited (haram) actions.
➋ For the eyes to be filled with grief and for tears to flow involuntarily is not prohibited (haram); in other words, the action of the eyes is not prohibited, rather it is the action of the tongue that is prohibited.