Abu Dawud

Hadith Commentary:

Benefits and Issues:

➊ Regarding the weeping of the family over the deceased, scholars have expressed different opinions:

➊ The first opinion is that weeping over the deceased, absolutely and without restriction, is prohibited, as is understood from the statement of Ibn Umar radi Allahu anhu, or it is prohibited in the case where the weeping occurs in the presence of the dying person and he does not stop it despite having the ability to do so, as is evident from Umar radi Allahu anhu stopping Suhayb and Hafsa radi Allahu anha.

➋ The second opinion is that weeping, in itself, does not become a cause of punishment for the deceased, because it is not his own action; how can he be held accountable for the actions of others? As the Noble Qur’an states:
“No bearer of burdens will bear the burden of another.” This was the view of Abu Hurayrah radi Allahu anhu, and some Shafi’is also hold this view, as does Aisha radi Allahu anha, apparently.
Therefore, Ibn Abbas radi Allahu anhuma and Aisha radi Allahu anha presented this verse as evidence:
“And it is He (Allah) who makes [one] laugh and weep.” However, according to the majority of the Ummah and the Imams, there is no contradiction between the hadiths of Umar radi Allahu anhu and Ibn Umar radi Allahu anhuma and the verses presented in opposition, and this narration is also established from several other Companions. Therefore, the correct view, as is established from the various narrations of Aisha radi Allahu anha herself and confirmed by the narrations of Umar radi Allahu anhu, is that the grief and sorrow of the relatives, friends, and loved ones over the deceased, and as a result, the tears flowing from their eyes and other involuntary manifestations of weeping, are natural matters. There is no accountability for this, but wailing (niyahah) and lamentation (nadbah) are blameworthy and subject to accountability.
Therefore, in some places in the narration of Umar radi Allahu anhu, the mention is of “some weeping” (ba‘d al-buka’), in some places “bima yukh ‘alayh” (that over which wailing is done), and in some places “ya‘ulu ‘alayh Hafsa wa ‘awwalu ‘alayh Suhayb” (that Hafsa and Suhayb wailed loudly over him), so Umar radi Allahu anhu said:
“al-mu‘awwal ‘alayh yu‘adhdhab” (the one over whom wailing and lamentation is done will be punished).
Thus, the punishment is not related to weeping itself, which is a natural thing; the prohibition is related to the tongue, from which improper words and sounds emerge.
As the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam pointed to the tongue and said:
“Indeed, Allah does not punish for the tears of the eye nor for the sorrow of the heart,”
because a person has no control or power over this.
“But He punishes for this”
—pointing to the tongue—meaning for its improper use in wailing, mourning, screaming, lamentation, or nadbah.
“He does not show mercy”
—but He shows mercy for its proper use, such as supplication, seeking forgiveness, and reciting istirja‘ (saying ‘Inna lillahi wa inna ilayhi raji‘un’).

➋ According to the majority of the Ummah, wailing (niyahah), lamentation (nadbah), tearing the collar, striking the cheeks, throwing dust on the head, etc., only become a cause for the deceased’s punishment if the deceased had a role in them, or was the cause, instigator, or motivator for them, as is established from the statement of Aisha radi Allahu anha:
“Indeed, Allah increases the punishment of the disbeliever due to the weeping of his family over him,”
because the disbeliever is the instigator or cause of it.
The Qur’an expresses this as:
“And they will surely carry their own burdens and burdens along with their burdens.”
And the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam wrote to Heraclius:
“If you turn away, then upon you is the sin of the Arisiyyin (your people).”
Therefore, Imam Bukhari’s view is that there is no contradiction between the statements of Umar radi Allahu anhu, Ibn Umar radi Allahu anhuma, and Aisha radi Allahu anha, because the father and son’s statements relate to the deceased who left behind a bad example and practice for his family, such that “if wailing was his custom,”
meaning wailing, lamentation, or screaming was his habit and practice, and his family learned this from him, as the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said that Qabil receives a share of every murder,
“because he was the first to establish the practice of killing.”
And Aisha radi Allahu anha’s intent is that when the deceased had no part in the wrongful customs and practices of his family, then, according to the principle of , how can the deceased be punished?
Therefore, Aisha radi Allahu anha’s statement that “they made a mistake, or forgot, or did not hear the complete hadith,” as stated by Imam Qurtubi, is not correct, because there is no contradiction between the two statements.
But most scholars are of the view that punishment occurs when the deceased himself instructed his family to weep and wail over him, as was the custom among the Arabs.

➌ Some scholars are of the view that punishment occurs when, in the deceased’s family, tribe, or clan, wailing and mourning over the dead was customary, and he never stopped them from this, i.e., he was negligent in their education and upbringing, and did not stop them from this even at the time of death.

➍ The actions or virtues and qualities which the family remembers and weeps over are themselves the cause of his punishment, because in the time of ignorance, people would commit murder, kidnapping, and terrorism, and the mourners would mention these evil deeds and weep over them—i.e., the authority and leadership by which he oppressed people, and the bravery and courage by which he plundered people’s honor and wealth—these were counted as virtues and were wailed over.

➎ By “punishment” is meant the rebuke and reprimand of the angels when the family members lament, saying:
“Wa ‘adhudahu!” (Oh, my support!)
“Wa nasirahu!” (Oh, my helper and supporter!)
“Wa kasiyahu!” (Oh, the one who clothed me!)
So the angels say to the deceased: “Were you really like that?”

➏ When the friends and relatives of the deceased weep, beat themselves, and wail over him, the deceased is pained and distressed by these wrongful actions of theirs. Qadi ‘Iyad, Ibn Qayyim, and others have favored this explanation.

➋ Regarding the hearing of the Prophet’s words by the corpses of the polytheists in the well of Badr, Aisha radi Allahu anha objected to this hadith, saying that Ibn Umar radi Allahu anhuma made a mistake or forgot. She did not say:
“Indeed, they hear what I say,”
but the majority of the Ummah have declared the hadith of Ibn Umar radi Allahu anhuma to be authentic, because it is also narrated from other Companions, and the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam himself affirmed it, saying:
“They know what I say,”
i.e., he did not use the words “they hear,” and the meaning of “Indeed, you cannot make the dead hear,” is that your making them hear is of no benefit to them now, because they have left the abode of action, and your preaching and admonition is no longer related to them. Therefore, the Companions said to the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam:
“O Messenger of Allah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, are you addressing people who have become corpses?”
Obviously, according to normal means and natural causes, no human has the ability to make the dead hear his words, but Allah is not bound by apparent and customary means; He is the Creator of causes, and He creates hidden and inner causes that are contrary to the usual ones. Therefore, the rule and principle is that we cannot make the dead hear, but “Indeed, Allah makes whom He wills hear,” and “You cannot make those in the graves hear,” and here Allah made them hear the words of His Messenger. He can make the heavens and the earth hear His words, and He made all humans hear His words before they came into this world. He can make the dead hear the footsteps of the living. If He made them hear the words of His Messenger, what impossibility is there in that? Therefore, Qatadah says that Allah revived them and made them hear the words of His Prophet, and so the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam replied to the Companions:
“You do not hear what I say any better than they do.”
Therefore, these words are also narrated from Aisha radi Allahu anha herself, as from Abu Talhah radi Allahu anhu:
“You do not hear what I say any better than they do.”
Thus, the Qur’an negates our making them hear, not their hearing.
But seeking help from the dead, calling upon them, and appealing to them for supplication is not permissible, because these are our actions, not Allah’s actions.
How can it be proven from Allah making them hear that they also hear our words? Because our inability to make them hear is a principle and rule, from which exception is not possible without evidence or text. So, whatever Allah has explicitly stated that He made them hear, we will accept.

Explanation:
1:
It is understood from this that if, without any intention or purpose, one’s gaze suddenly falls upon a non-mahram (strange) woman, then there is no harm in it.
The harm and sin lie in looking repeatedly and deliberately with intention and purpose.
And it is also necessary that even the sudden gaze should be turned away immediately.